Last time, I used: “Anybody need anything while I’m out?” and that went over well. May not make it through this surgery on Friday, so I turn to Lemmy for top-notch suggestions for my potential last words!
It’s pretty clear to me many people here have never either had general anesthesia or talked to anyone who had, you can’t really time funny one-liners right before you pass out.
Here’s how it works:
They’ll put a mask with a rubber tube in your mouth for oxygen, and tell you to relax and count back from 10, so you start counting impatiently(it’s boring, and there is nothing else to do), wondering when the surgery is going to start.
Ten.
Nine.
Eight.
Now the anesthesiologist is in front of you, checking on you to see if you’re OK. “But I haven’t finish counting down yet, when is the surgery going to start?” You ask them.
“It’s already over”, they explain.
Then you realize you are in a completely different room, the tube is no longer in your mouth, but you feel so weak you can hardly move, and the stitches/staples around your new surgery wound is starting to itch.
It’s like a segment of your life was cut out and erased into nothingness.
Proper explanation, indeed - you never get all the way through the countdown before you time travel. Beforehand, though (at least in my too many to count without it sounding like a weird brag experiences), the “last words” moment is before the mask, but after the pre-anesthesia. Depends on the procedure, and probably the person, too.
I’ve had many surgeries and most were exactly like this. One time, though, I remember counting down too 4 and then saying, “My ears are ringing.” The anesthesiologist said, “Is this better?” I said, “Yes,” and then woke up.
I could feel that I was going out as I counted. It felt as if I slowly lifted an inch above the operating table and rested on a fluffy white cloud. I could feel them inserting catheter and needles but it didn’t hurt even a bit, if anything it tickled. Last sight was the grumpy face of this fridge-sized bald anesthesiologist.
Woke up a second later in Intensive Care unit, surprisingly well rested.
By the way, there was no tube in my mouth. They just put a mask on and it smelled sweet.
Depending on how consciousness actually works, the you before that might have died and you’re an entirely new consciousness with the same brain and memories.
I’ve thought about death and what it means a lot in recent months.
As we go to sleep every night, how do we know the you who wakes up the next morning is still you?
While sleeping brain activity retains a natural patern and flow, no point in worrying about that since sleep is absolutely a necessity (and I love it). Anesthesia disrupts this brain activity and interrupts your mental existence.
Ah, the Star Trek transporter conundrum.
That’s about how it worked for me on the second surgery. Apparently my first words coming to were “holy fuck I need a cigarette”
Not my experience, I was put to sleep through IV and I knew when I was falling asleep. I then had a weird dream mixed with reality, and when I woke up all the text was upside down for a minute.
ʍʇɟ
Same, every time I’ve had a general aesthetic the anaesthesiologist has sat down near my arm, asked if I’m ready, and when I say “yup” he says some medical jargon to the anesthetist/resp nurse, then warns me that it’s going to feel cold and taste funny, he connects a bolus syringe to my IV bung and as he’s pushing tells me to count down from ten, and the anesthetist grabs my head gently as the anaesthesiologist moves around towards my head and presumably grabs some other instruments ready to intubate.
My record is 7. But next time I’m going to try counting faster - not sure why but I’d always try to time it to actual seconds.
For GA, I’ve never been given a gas mask while awake, maybe it’s to do with “rapid induction”, I’m not 100% sure what that is, only that every anaesthesiologist I’ve had has said he’s going to “rapidly induce” because my connective tissue disorder indicates the need to. I never really questioned it.
The only time I’ve been given a mask while being told to count was when I was going under twilight sedation for a colonoscopy. as they were administering the IV, they also gave me a mask that was unexpectedly strawberry “flavoured” and I had a panic attack as I was going under because my grandma is allergic to strawberries, I’m not, but in my semi lucid state I forgot I wasn’t and started mumbling about being allergic to air.
(I’ve only ever had male anaesthesiologists, so apppogies for only using male pronouns to describe the doctor)
I was just put under a couple of weeks ago and they didn’t ask me to count down. And it also took longer than that.
I had no mask for my surgery. Maybe because it was removing wisdom teeth.
My surgery was then starting liquid in my arm. I’m wheeled to the surgery room where three nurses are setting things up.
They see I’m nervous. “Don’t worry! Doctor X is very good,” she pauses. “We do call him the velociraptor though.”
“Why?”
“Because he has short arms!”
“That’s mean!” I say.
They laugh. “You won’t remember, it’s fine.”
“I’ll remember!” I try and say, but my mouth is full of gauze and I’m in a very different room.
No sense of passage of time. In surgery, then in recovery. Hated that.
Same case here with wisdom tooth removal but I do vaguely remember my entire body becoming numb before it stopped being numb instantly and the surgery was over
oof, yup, that sounds familiar XD
True story: The morning before going in for foot surgery, my mom was in a silly mood and wrote “wrong foot” on the other non-surgery-scheduled foot with a marker before putting on her socks.
After the surgery everything was fine, and later when checking up on her the surgeon told her everyone in the operating room got a good laugh out of that “wrong foot” message.
Mom was glad her joke worked out, but later started wondering why they were looking at the wrong foot in the first place and now wonders if her private joke to amuse herself actually saved her from having the wrong foot operated upon.
Medical staff actually DO sometimes write on the appendage that they are supposed to operate on as one of their checks.
Yeah, in my hospital pre-op, we physically hand a marker to the patient and tell them to mark where the surgery will be.
The patient has to get exposed and positioned, then padded (so there are no pressure injuries, no errant cables or equipment pushing on skin, etc). Also under anesthesia (depending on the type but I’ll assume general/completely asleep) you aren’t moving and your body may get moved or shifted into an unnatural position.
It’s also nice to have controls as mentioned by another reply, but pulse oximetry is great, and can be slapped on any non sterilized area to assess oxygenation.
I had to be in twilight, that’s where you’re basicilly out but can just barely understand what’s going on a bit. I was in and out and just absolutely baked. At one point I looked at the anesthesiologist and asked for a little more. He got concerned and asked if I could feel anything? I said “no, no I can’t. I’m just having a really good time”. I’m not sure because he was wearing a mask and all, but I think he grinned and I have zero memory from then.
I went with the Leslie Nielsen quote from the movie Airplane, “I just wanted to say good luck, we’re all counting on you.”
Bonus points if you say it when entering the operating room, when given the anesthesia and a third time during the surgery itself
Actually when I made the joke, I got zero laughs in the operating room. I had to explain the joke, and still got no real comment/laugh.
I finally followed it up with a Rodney Dangerfield version of “Tough room” and that got a chuckle finally.
Just randomly wake up during your surgery and say it, and then promptly go back to sleep.
You can do what my 4yo did before his last surgery: shout out “WAIT WAIT WAIT!” right before they put on your mask or give you the drip, then hold out your fist and say, “FIST BUMP!”
“I’m aware that consciousness still exists under general anesthesia, but the brain is no longer capable of forming memories, so have fun stabbing me with knives, I’m actually going to feel it!”
I broke my ankle a few years back and the bones had to be surgically reattached, but the OR was full so they had to set and splint it in the meantime. The shot of fentanyl didn’t do anything, so they gave a cocktail that knocked me right the fuck out and set my ankle. My husband said I shot straight up like I was in the Exorcist, yelled and swore a bunch and passed out again. I remember nothing, thankfully.
I’ve had that. They said I’d be awake but won’t remember anything. I’d feel it but won’t care.
Sure enough, I’m sitting up in bed, doctors are gone, and my leg is set, I feel totally normal. I had no idea what happened except that they said that’d happen. It was the weirdest experience. I hadn’t even changed positions. Like 15 minutes just got stolen from me.
But hang on, there’s an interesting topic. Is consciousness the current processing, or is it the memory (and perhaps something additional)? Since not all nerve signals arrive in the brain at the same time, consciousness provably isn’t immediate. Perhaps it’s the recent memory of what just happened?
Fuck dude… You just told everyone that we’re living in a constant state of desync and the gamer in me doesn’t know how to handle that
Eh…life is an MMRPG, so a bit of lag is normal…
What about now?
Lol, wait till you see the specs
Separately, is it still pain if you’re not conscious of it?
Doctors used to assert that babies didn’t feel pain, because 1) they couldn’t tell us about it, and 2) they didn’t remember it later. They would just not anesthetize babies. Of course, that endpoint of this line of reasoning is horrifying, but it’s still a fair question. When we say “pain” do we mean the firing of the nerves, or do we mean awareness of it?
Note that you’re getting into something that was a big deal in the 70s and 80s. They’d perform any surgery on babies without anesthetic (which is dangerous to babies) because it was believed that they wouldn’t remember anyway so it wasn’t a big deal after all. I suspect that people will learn about this with horror.
When we say “pain” do we mean the firing of the nerves, or do we mean awareness of it?
I’d say awareness of it, especially considering AFAIK local anesthesia (as in, fully awake during) doesn’t stop the nerves from firing, just from the signals getting to the brain, and I’d say that’s blocking the pain.^
Also there’s an interesting point in there: (this is not a rebuttal, just an addition)
Doctors used to assert that babies didn’t feel pain, because 1) they couldn’t tell us about it, and 2) they didn’t remember it later.
The reason doctors nowadays use anesthesia, (besides it being squick-y not to) is because it was discovered that, (though they may not consciously remember it) it can manifest in PTSD and other trauma related disorders later in life.^
In addition, it was found that there is a heightened level of stress hormones during surgery on infants, which were absent in surgery done with anesthesia.^ (These stress hormones also increased the risk in post-operational complications, due to the hormones acting to break down carbohydrates and other fats in the infant’s bodies)
I’ve had a lot of different injuries. On heavy morphine and pethadine, you definitely feel pain just as bad but you don’t care and just kind of forget about it. It’s like it dulls the nervous system in a way that it’s not blocking signals, it’s blocking how your system reacts to them. It’s hard to explain, but it’s a pretty surreal experience. You should be stressing, but you’re not. You’re very aware of the severity of the injury, but you’re totally calm about it and it slips your mind, like pain is the lowest concern.
I’m usually thinking like, “I wonder how the fix will go? What if I need to pee? I hope recovery isn’t months… Oh, yeah, and my limb is on fire with a bone sticking out, but they’re on it. I hope there’s no snorers in my ward and the food’s good. It’d be nice if they operate this evening because this sucks. I hope I can self-medicate morphine for sleep tonight. That really helped last time. I feel fucking great and am dribbling. Oh, yeah, and my limb is on fire with a bone sticking out. Meh…”
Thank you for sharing your experience!
“carbohydrates and other fats”? Did I not pay attention about carbohydrates in school?
Yes, pain is pain. People can still feel it and suffer even if they do not remember it. Anesthesia in context of surgery is too complex of a topic for me to comment on but I do frequently manage patients that are sedated, on ventilators either going to or coming from surgery. There are different scales and tools we use to assess if someone is under sedated or in pain. Keeping explanations simple pain can reflect as changes in vital signs, rigid or tense muscles, facial expressions. Sedation in the context I’m referring to is more a scale of either how awake someone is or what type of stimulation they respond to, for example do they open their eyes if someone says their name? Or do they open their eyes if I gently tap on their shoulder or do I need to put pressure on their nail bed for them to respond, if they respond at all. If they’re sedated enough they won’t remember the pain but they would still feel pain. Again this is NOT referring to general anesthesia during surgery, that is too complex and anesthesiologist have a very difficult job ensuring people are adequately medicated for surgery while also ensuring that they treat the side effects of the anesthesia medications so they don’t just kill people.
The two do have some overlap and my previous statement assumes no chemical paralysis. There are also times where it is acceptable to just sedate someone, or do something emergent without sedation and then giving something like Versed which causes retrograde amnesia. The person may have been fully conscious and felt everything that just happened but still won’t remember it.
This is a bit of an oversimplification but I’d say firing of the nerves is pain. I don’t have literature available to support but I know giving babies anesthesia is very dangerous so I would like to believe that the reasons you listed where just an over simplified “it’s really okay to do X or Y because they won’t remember it” rather than explaining to a parent in a way that they would truly understand the risk of anesthesia for a baby AND still allow whatever procedure to be done or force a parent to knowingly elect to put their baby through pain and suffering for a procedure. But again, not a doctor and I don’t work with people/babies during surgery
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(I know this is probably impossible, but it would be so funny)
Tell a knock knock joke, but only the first part. Don’t reveal the punchline, just pass out. So they work extra hard to keep you alive, because only then will they hear the punchline.
I endorse this one.
In your best Ace Ventura voice: “If I’m not back in five minutes…just wait longer.”
Good luck with your surgery, hope it goes well and your recovery is as easy as it can be. 🙏
Similarly,“and in case I don’t see ya, good afternoon, good evening, and good night!”
Good luck with your surgery, hope it goes well and your recovery is as easy as it can be. 🙏
For a second I thought that was your suggestion for what OP should say to the surgeon.
We should normalize wishing your surgeon good luck, have fun before he operates on you, and then GG if it’s successful and you live
I asked my doctor “You’ve done this before, right?” he didn’t laugh.
Did he start to sweat and stutter, instead?
Everyone has to start somewhere.
I hope you got a coupon discount or something, though.
I hope you all paid attention in class
“Jokes on him, I got my MD degree from a shady website” - Doctor
“I’ll see you on the other side.” Works both ways.
Fuck, I left the oven on.
“What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical statement?”
Point to the anesthesiologist, “Yo, this guys got the good stuff! Anyone else want a hit?”
“don’t touch my junk” - “not bad for a first date” - “any message for the other side?” - “I’ll let you know what the old man says” - “delete my browser history” - “I forgot the stove on”
I like “delete my browser history.”
I’m getting SRS next year. Idk if the first one would or wouldn’t work, the second one could be spicy lol
I hope it is everything you envision it to be, and I wish you the very best.
Thank you <3 I never thought I’d actually have the chance for anything like this but I managed to luck out at a tech job with good insurance. It’s all still a bit wild to me that it is even an option
I’m also getting GCS next year and am peeping this thread for ideas lol
Fuck yeah! Happy for you <3
