I mean, I’m anti-meds for treating exogenic issues when something can be done for those exogenic issues.

If I’m sitting at home with the heater on and I start feeling warm and flushed, I wouldn’t take an ibuprofen (as an anti-pyretic) to bring my temperature down, I’ll turn the heater off.

It’s the same for mental health, if the sole source of the stress/sorrow is external, medication is nothing more than a bandaid, which is better than nothing if the exogenic influence is outside your individual control (which it often is)… But we are at a point where the majority of people with mental health issues are experiencing a level of exogenic influence and there are enough of us that if we organised we could change the factors that are causing or worsening our mental health symptoms.

So it bears talking about, is medication always appropriate?

Medication is important, especially for endogenic conditions, and medication is life saving. But if you have exogenic depression and the meds aren’t working, the new prescription is protest.

This is what is breaking my mental health.

Life is not guaranteed to be good, nature is cruel and has no rhyme or reason. People die and suffer in horrific ways every day because of nature.

Why the fuck are we adding to that cruelty!?

The chaos of the natural order of the universe sucks and you’ve got to learn to cope with that. But I’ve always found that side of life easy to accept because it is so inevitably universally unavailable.

I was born with a genetic illness, it causes lifelong disability due to structural deformity, but can also just randomly cause fatal aneurysms in young people. That’s nature, that sucks, but hey, what are you going to do? Figure out how to do what you need to do to live and live it.

But then I’m born into a country with no disability discrimination laws, and no right to access laws. Fortunately we had public healthcare and public disability services, and public welfare services, and when I was younger a disability act was finally brought in (though it’s often just lip service)

Growing up I felt safe and secure knowing I had a good social support system…but the public disability services shut down and was replaced by an insurance model, the public healthcare has been functionally split to a semi public copay system and a private paid system, and the welfare pension is so far below the poverty line that people on a disability pension don’t earn enough money to meet the eligibility for public housing.

(yes, You can be too poor, for public/social housing.)

And it’s one thing for law and legislation to lag behind the needs of the people, it’s another thing altogether when an individual or small group of individuals in power systematically impose laws to remove the support and resources you used to have, for barely no more reason than “they want to”.

I can’t help but feel that a significant portion of my suffering is the result of the few people in the local conservative government that shut down the public disability service providers because it was “costing too much” … Even though the insurance model they replaced it with costs the government more and supports less people than the previous system, and supports them less effectively.

And how do you live with that?

Like it’s one thing for nature to have cursed me to suffer, but a human being heard my story, and countless stories like mine, and still said “nah, fuck em” when it came to vote.

We are living with psychopaths and sociopaths in complete control over our lives. The suffering is happening for a reason, and the reason is that those who are causing the suffering are enjoying the situation (because it gives them money, power, influence, or straight up sadism)

How the fuck do you reconcile that and “learn to sit with your emotions” in one CBT session and in the very next session my therapist is going to teach me about “enforcing my boundaries”… How do I enforce my personal boundary to get the homophobic, transphobic, xenophobic and ableist government to stop abusing me? Oh, I don’t, I sit with that emotion.

I can’t afford the pills they recommend.

I’m on board!

I’m a big fan of the word cunt in all of its current uses it’s my preferred slang term for my own, though it’s rare to find someone who’s not taken aback by that in the bedroom.

Would it be a grammatically consistent pronoun? “oh, someone left cunt wallet, I hope cunt come get it” or do we need a cunt/cunter situation? So cunt can collect cunter wallet.

The way the OP phrases it rules out trans men who have vaginas, trans women who have vaginas, and a bunch of cis women who’ve had certain pelvic traumas or cancers and therefore don’t have vaginas.

What he’s trying to say is “if you were born with a vagina and you align with it” which is actually still funny because I was born with my vagina, I like my vagina, I’ll be happily keeping it even after all my surgeries…but if this OP saw my face he would put me in the “trans man” bucket because they lack nuance around identity.

You need to get big into two tone ska, then the fedora is socially acceptable again.

partners they could hypothetically reproduce with

“fertile women”

“women capable of pregnancy”

Outdated, slight red flag option: “gynephile”

Or you could even try “I find women attractive and would love to have kids with the woman I love one day”

There, language isn’t that hard.

I love that half of these are fully gender neutral terms of endearment in Australia 😂

See this way of thinking has actually landed me in a pretty bad place with my mental health.

“I’m in charge of my own emotions” is not something an autistic person with rigid lines of thinking should internalise, but I did.

As a result I never gave myself permission to feel negative emotions, because who wants to feel negative about anything if they don’t have to?

It seemed so smart and healthy, just be happy, that’s what everyone always says about the easy fix to mental health. It was easy too, regardless what was happening around me, if I pictured myself feeling happy, I’d feel happy.

I’m in my 30s and regularly mistake sensations with other sensations (am I tired or do I need to pee? They both cause a headache) and also I think all my negative emotions are skipping my brain entirely and coming out my arse in the form of IBS.

I can’t picture myself feeling sad to experience sad because I …don’t remember what sad feels like.

I remember what vomiting feels like, because that’s how my body has reacted to “sad” recently.

I can see how it’s directly linked to “people are out there shooting CEOs for this, you’re next” is threatening, but I dont see how the language of the threat implies that the person saying the threat has any intention to also be the shooter, and not just that they wish and believe that a shooter is out there with this CEO on their hit list.

This, if anything it might clarify a few confusing exchanges we’ve had in the past, and it will certainly help me be a better friend in the the future.

If I already know you, I know you, I’m choosing to be friends with you because of how you treat me and how you treat others when we hang out together. If I had any problems with that, I wouldn’t be friends long enough to hear you tell me about your NPD diagnosis.

Now that said, I’ve had friends tell me about a diagnosis and it shouldn’t change anything, but now that the diagnosis is out in the open they want it to change things and I can’t offer that to the friendship, such as compromising on my own boundaries (eg: I had a friend who after explaining their condition asked me to provide tone indicators for everything I say, but I have alexithymia so that was really difficult for me to do and I couldn’t adjust my behaviour to meet the new expectations of the friendship, so we faded out of each other’s lives, they told people I stopped being friends with them because of their anxiety disorder… No it’s because I couldn’t meet the changed expectations of the friendship, describing my emotions every minute is hard for me and I choose not to be friends with people who require me to do that for their comfort)

“you people are next” doesn’t sound direct to me because “next” for what? Next for a random vigilante to shoot, next to die in general, next to face bad PR?

My interpretation also leaves no room to imply I’ll be the one actioning whatever the “next” thing is. I’d use “you’re next” in the same use case as “karma will get you” or “the universe will balance out your luck” it’s more of a cosmic wish than a rise to action.

Wait, what’s the internet definition of the word?

I thought hussy was a synonym for “loose woman”

What does it mean now days?

Edit: oh, it’s not that hussy has a different definition on the internet, it’s that it looks like “bussy” if you’re not looking closely?

Which I never read correctly anyway because I see it written like that and in my head I’m saying “bah see” not “buo see”

The “Bail out Bed” was a flawed idea because no one wants to get up and relocate in the middle of the night and interrupt their sleep cycles.

He snores, he always snores, tonight won’t be any different, so why don’t I just start in the bail out bed so once I fall asleep I stay asleep and the human freight train I shacked up with doesn’t wake me up.

He finally got a Cpap last year for his obstructive sleep apnoea.

but we’d slept in separate beds for 5 years, and I was used to sleeping alone and having full control over my temperature and I’m a fidgety sleeper, so we couldn’t get used to sharing a bed again.

I think both of us being well rested and refreshed each day is more important to the health of our relationship than sharing a bed. If we’re not fatigued, headachey and cranky, we can spend quality time together outside of bed.

I’m Australian and was always told the cover letter was unnecessary, especially if your CV has a bio.

The cover letter was for additional information not covered by the resume - name dropping the manager at the company you know who inspired you to apply, explaining why it appears your changing industries, justifying “overqualifications”, mentioning a personal hobby that’s relevant to the industry and isn’t technical work experience.

Basically the things you plan to bring up in the interview to wow them, you can introduce them while introducing yourself in a cover letter.

But if your resume lines up with the position description, you don’t need a cover letter.

Basically I was told a cover letter is necessary when you’re a burnt out nurse or teacher applying to be a cashier at kmart to avoid having your resume immediately thrown out.

That said. I’ve literally never written one, even as a serial industry hopper. If there’s no email address to send my resume too, then the system is too auto for a cover letter and they don’t want to read it anyway, if there is an email address, just include a few lines of a short cover letter in the body text of the email before attaching your resume.

I still feel like the nouns are in the wrong place when I read this.

I’m reading it as “New York cows new York cows bully bully New York cows”

When I want it to read “New York cows bully new York cows” which would be “Buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo” which isn’t enough buffalo.

I have to inset my own “that” to be able to get my head around “Buffalo buffalo (that) Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo”

Both the battery and the charger are old and broken in my brain.

If it’s too hot out the battery drains faster, if I’m playing music the battery drains faster. If I’m having to swap between conversations, bye bye battery.

Sometimes the charger works fine but sometimes it just doesn’t charge no matter what I try, and the battery stays low even if I leave it plugged in alone.

Some days there’s a process that’s absolutely and inexplicably guzzling power, but the next day that same process barely takes up any processing power.

Some days it just doesn’t turn on at all, and then on rare occasions I can’t get the damn thing to turn off, it’s just blasting notifications and I’m trying to sleep.

Related: personally I think “old phone battery” is a much better metaphor than the “chronically ill spoons” metaphor that is commonly used to explain the impact of chronic illness.

He’s also not a racist!

This is the thing. Musk and everything his company does in terms of labour and marketing, and just their whole ethos is unethical as fuck, and I can’t stand that as a society we are celebrating Tesla.

But self driving cars are not inherently bad or dangerous to persue as a technological advancement.

Self driving cars will kill people, they’ll will hit pedestrians and crash into things.

So do cars driven by humans.

Human driven cars kill a lot of people.

Self driving cars need to be safer than human driven cars to even consider letting them on the the road, but we can’t truly expect a 0% accident rate on self driving cars in the early days of the technology when we don’t expect that of the humanity driven cars.

I managed to go all of 22-28 never once being carded for anything.

When I hit 30 I started getting carded for things I’d never been carded for before, even the milk bar I’d bought smokes at for 10 years, same guy and his son running it, suddenly started carding me.

That’s how I learned the ID that I’d been carrying around for 10-11 years since getting my photo ID in highschool was functionally useless, because hardly anywhere would accept it as legal ID despite it being legal ID.

I had to keep the website for the government list of ID boolmarkef so I could show doubtful cashiers that my ID was indeed federally accepted, legal and valid ID.

I went to try and get a different type of ID last year which is how it found out that despite being born in my country to a citizen of my country, and having my birth recorded and receiving my birth certificate. Somehow I’m not actually a citizen of my own country and I can’t get a passport…so I’m trying to navigate that system but that’s extra fun and confusing because I have neurodevelopmental issues and no one to help me understand what I need to to do.

I just want to be able to buy alcohol as a person in their 30s, without having to jump through impossible hoops to prove that I’m not not 17.

I’ve got smile lines and the beginnings of crows feet, I am weathered! Why am it getting carded now

It helps that I’d had several previous surgeries, so I’d had practice at keeping my cool. Plus my surgeon was in discussion with me for months with multiple consultations to really understand the issue, I don’t think I could have possibly been in safer hands.