"Russians be like

1 Hungarians"?

I fucked Ted

I read “Orcas” as “Oscar” for a second was very surprised as to what gad happened to the academy awards

Are you suggesting that for the entire climactic finale of this movie, he had a raging BatBoner?

I love Satisfactory but scrolling through a longer list of items can be a real pain. Scrolling with the mouse wheel feels incredibly slow and clicking the wheel once and then moving the the cursor down simply isn’t an option

So I’m often forced to resort to dragging the scroll bar manually, just like people in medieval times did

Cain and Able weren’t Adam and Eves only children. Keep in mind that canonically, Adam lived for over 900 years. That’s a lot of time you can use to make more babies.

After the whole regicide incident, they also had Seth. Both him and his exiled brother ended up marrying their sisters. Their descendants did the same. So yeah, it’s all incest, top to bottom.

The biblical flood was actually created to wipe out the descendants of Cain, since Noah and his cousins wife were both descendants of Seth

It’s the garden of eden so there’s no reason to believe that it’s a fruit we have. My head canon is that it was a giant, fruit shaped flaming hot Cheeto

Maybe 10 years ago but nowadays it’s internationally much more ubiquitous

If you hadn’t lied they would have burned you at the steak

France just happened to get nuked by the English at that very moment. It was unrelated to the helium situation

“Please, Mr. Hands was my father. Call me Geoff”

Somewhat related, there’s a notable decrease in gang violence un Mexico whenever a new Dragon Ball movie gets released

Unfortunately, neither vanilla nor coffee beans are actual beans

Come to think of it, why is stuff like nicotine gum only marketed to people who wanna quit smoking? Couldn’t non smokers also just use it for a mild high?

Mads looks genuinely upset that you interrupted their little love session

I don’t think I remember that episode of Archer

This is my private domicile and I will not be harassed

The corpse of Harry Potter that’s slowly coming back to life

Oh wait, that movie exists already

Of coure the large breasted, scarcely dressed waifu of questionable age shall still be referred to as “Wilson”

And almond milk isn’t actually milked from almond tiddies

And wait until you learn about baby oil