• hperrin@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    This is not biblically accurate. She should be naked, since she doesn’t yet have knowledge of good and evil, and god considers nudity evil, because he is a prude. But also he didn’t clothe Adam and Eve, cause he’s a perv.

  • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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    20 days ago

    This implies that the garden of Eden was in the US as they’re the only ones that know what pumpkin spice even is.

    • dragontamer@lemmy.world
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      20 days ago

      Actually, the Bible just says it’s the fruit of a tree.

      It could have been an orange, pomegranate, or banana.

      • leftzero@lemmynsfw.com
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        20 days ago

        Pomegranates are one of the oldest cultivated fruits, so they’re somewhat plausible, but I’m fairly certain humans made oranges (and most other citruses, through selection and grafting… though I guess it could have been a mandarin, pomelo, or citron, which seem to be the three we started with) and bananas (through selection and cloning), so it couldn’t have been those.

        Apples, on the other hand, seem to have existed long before humans, so they’re definitely a possibility.

        It was probably some kind of nut, though.

        • Whelks_chance@lemmy.world
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          20 days ago

          I’ve been wondering about this for a while, and I’ve come to the conclusion that blackberries are probably the original thing. Brambles grow like weeds all over Europe, I don’t think anyone is cultivating them to be different. Apples definitely have had a human hand in selecting the best apples to start fresh orchards with.

          I’m open to correction though.

        • Homescool@lemmy.world
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          19 days ago

          Apples existed, but they looked and tasted nothing like they do now. Today’s apples are sweet and swole and that’s brought to you by selective breeding and a growth strategy that extended beyond cider to dominate the mobile phone industry.

    • okwhateverdude@lemmy.world
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      20 days ago

      The bible says lots of stuff, like this weird erotica about two slutty concubine sisters and how much they loved cock (which was too much):

      “There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.”

      https://biblehub.com/ezekiel/23-20.htm

      Truly, Divine Inspiration was given that day to that author. Praise be to Him for sharing His weird Smut with us little people.

      • acockworkorange@mander.xyz
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        20 days ago

        Isn’t that the story that ends in a brutal execution of the sisters? Because the author couldn’t think of nothing but the prostitutes that wouldn’t lay with him?

        • okwhateverdude@lemmy.world
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          20 days ago

          https://biblehub.com/bsb/ezekiel/23.htm

          Yeah, something like that. Not really an incel-revenge, though. More like hyper-possessive misogyny. Dude “marries” a couple of prostitutes from another country. Brings them home. Very likely they aren’t super happy with the arrangement since they are inviting dudes from back home to come over. Author frames it as if they prefer their donkey sized cocks (tiny penis rage). The author has a “chat” with God and God’s prognosis of the situation is to first condemn their “infidelity” to their face and then gather a mob to do some brutal shit to the women.

      • frezik@midwest.social
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        20 days ago

        It’s retconned that way. There’s nothing that directly connects the serpent of Genesis, the one “roaming throughout the earth” in Job, and the character of Satan later on. Satan wasn’t developed as a character until after the Babylonian Exile. You can make it all fit, but the text alone doesn’t say that and the writers didn’t think of it that way.