For context: I’m a young adult, I don’t think I have any serious brain issues yet.
But I’ve recently been just trying to remember the past and although its kinda tragic, there are very interesting moments and I want to keep these memories forever.
But brains aren’t perfect, and I’m just so scared.
Even re-reading the events from a journal woudn’t exactly be the same as remembering it.
Idk, I’m kinda just obsessed with some memories for some reason. Don’t wanna let go of it. Having this “backstory” (for lack of a better term), is what drives me forward, without those memories, like if I get a concussion and forgot everything, I wouldn’t really be… well… “me” anymore, and the thought of that is terrifying.
The self is an illusion. If you want to be happy, forget.
Eh, I felt pretty happy recalling some childhood memories. The present is a whole fucking mess, especially when it comes to politics.
Ever since my 2nd open heart surgery, I feel as though my memories from before then are kinda mushy and since then I don’t know whether my memory formation would be considered normal, so yeah I am worried, too.
I’m in my mid-20s and wonder what’s the issue with my brain. It’s not such a big issue I need to be checked out, but I’m still curious. Not seeing whether my state health insurance would cover having my brain scanned and tested curious, but curious nonetheless.
I have foggy memories I would love to remember whether they’re true or not, but I just don’t know where to begin. I mean, I think I went on a road trip with my brother’s friends family out of city, but I don’t fully remember whether that actually happened or not. Just the feint potential memory of a slanted white basement ceiling with a while pillar holding it up, sunny day, and potentially walking on a TLC desperate road with my brother and his friend. I would ask the friends parents, but I’m not sure they’d remember and it would be kinda awkward to just ask out of the blue since I have zero contact with them.
Start journaling now.
This. Reading what you personally write is really good for recalling the related memories. Doing it often will strengthen the connection.
My mom was put out for a big surgery, and she still has memory holes and foggy bits from the anesthetic and the morphine beforehand. If made her previous memories foggy and impairs new memory formation. So she’s a little fuddy, but it’s improving.
Yeah… I told myself to start a year ago…
Maybe I’ll start tomorrow…
You pick up the journal you bought last year. It’s been sitting on the shelf since you lost interest 11 months ago. You had hoped it would be a way to reassure yourself in the face of eternity. But, what’s this… The book is almost full, and the last entry is dated yesterday.
Brb, gonna go out to look for John G
Was in an abusive long term relationship. I remember as I was breaking out of it suddenly remembering things I was legitimately repressing. I hated that.
I will say though on the idea of the death of the current self, that is sort of inevitable and absolutely neccery for the future you to exist. Kind of like how us now are different people then when we are 5 years old, and that’s a good thing, even if our existence at 5 was also a good thing.
Well if you forget them, you wouldn’t remember them to forget them.
Though seriously, I find interviews, photos, videos even of people telling stories helps. It’s the same idea that documentaries use to tell stories.
What if you had an object that would only help you remember that you had forgotten something, but not tell you what it was that you had forgotten?
I have photos of childhood events that I can’t remember. I kinda don’t trust them, I feel like they are forged or something.
Logically it should be real, but I’m just so sus af, after seeing the Vsauce video about implanting memories into people.
I also feel this, also talking to my parents about things I think i remember only to be told I’m imagining it.
I dont really think theres any nefarious paranoia-inducing plot, but its fun to pretend sometimes.
I remember my brother got mad at me and tied me up when we were alone at home. I talked about it like a few years ago and my mother denied it happening. Like no wtf 6 years old me couldn’t have made that up, I literally remember the pain of just not being able to move, and its why I’m still scared of my older brother. And like if I push the subject, she’d make excuses like: “If that happened, he [my older brother] was still a child, you can’t blame him too much” or some BS. Bro he was 5 years older than me. Wtf.
Like I think I’m the only person in the entire world that still remembers, that shit literally cannot be forgotten. Abusers just delete their memories and pretend they are good people.
Yeah, I remember vividly waking up one day at the end of my teenage years and realizing that I almost completely forgot my childhood, now I just see flashes when I try to remember it.
It’s why I don’t believe in biographies, no way you remember your entire childhood.
I actually remember a lot about my childhood. When I was 4 my mother died and afterwards, for some reason, everyone thought it would be comforting to tell me I wouldn’t remember her in a few years anyway. I remember not understanding a world where I would ever forget my mother so I forced myself to remember my favorite memories. I’d go over them in my mind all the time. And one day when I was 12 or so I wrote them all down so even if I did forget I’d still know it happened. People are still surprised I remember so much from that time, 40 years later.
Fucking hell. You’ll forget her anyways!? Brutal bro.
If I see an autobiography like when the author hesitates, like: “I’m not sure if…”, then I’d probably be more inclined to believe it more than those who state events as absolute facts.
As someone with shitty memory: I forget a lot. Whole holidays, people, what I ate yesterday… I have always been that way, and so far I’ve been doing quite ok in life.
But while I forgot how it felt in a past, shitty job, I don’t forget how I promised myself to never work for such a boss again. Or how 16-year old me decided to stay in school aftet trying out metalworking over a summer. I may forget how it was, but I rarely forget what conclusion I drew from it. And that is what defines me as a person, not that I remember the face of my condescending, stupid boss.
Also, while it sucks, my life is my present. My past might be entirely hallucinated, and I might be hit by a bus tomorrow. But now, here, I am alive.
I read an article about how we don’t remember events correctly and that’s why I started writing a dairy. I’ve been writing almost every day now since 2016, sometimes just half a page, sometimes more.
Can’t think of a better remedy.
I used to be worried about this.
Once when I was very young, I wondered if I could fix a moment in my memory and keep it for life - so I tried it.
Stupid result: I still remember that moment quite well, many decades later. It was a dumb boring moment. I’m sure I would have long forgotten, if I hadn’t tried to keep it.
Now it is a precious memory of how I have always bent toward scientific method.
All that to say: memory works better and longer than I expected.
Disclaimer: My generic history suggests I will lose that memory and most others, if I live long enough. It is terrifying, but I’ve learned to live with that fear, and try to eat right and exercise. And I figure lots of things could take me out before that becomes a problem, so there’s no need to borrow too much stress from that possible future, yet.
Works if you consciously burn it in. I’ve done the exact thing as you, consciously decided to remember a boring moment.
Oh, that fear gets much worse when dealing with people with various forms of dementia.
I honestly hope that I die before I get really bad dementia.
I have ADHD. I don’t even remember how many things there are that I’ve forgotten, so I’m not worried about having forgotten them.
Mate, I look at it this way: if you’ve forgotten your memory, how would you know that you’ve lost it? You’ld just carry on.
I know that I lost most of the memories of my childhood, because I barely remember any of it.
Well, I can remember a lot of it with the right prompts, just can’t recall at will. Yay ADHD!
I think most people can’t just replay their childhood at will. I’ve recently been talking to my siblings a lot (and have also previously had similar conversations with my spouse about our history) and am often told that they’re very impressed by the scope of my memory.
However, the stories I recall to them aren’t just memories that I sought out and retrieved. They’re things that I was reminded of by the path of our conversations (or other external stimuli) - what you might call prompts.
If you were to browse my comment history, you would see a similar phenomenon: I tell lots of anecdotes and they are (at least in my eyes) relevant to the conversation, but for many of those stories, I didn’t have them immediately available. Instead they were summoned by the comment thread.
edit: Maybe this is an ADHD thing. That said, while I’m almost certainly neurodivergent, I’ve never been diagnosed with ADHD and don’t believe I have it. However, it’s not impossible and I don’t mean to invalidate your perspective, just provide mine.
I do not remember the name of a song that I listened to in the early 2010s, but I remember vague details. So yes, you can know you lost a memory.
I’m not sure that doesn’t make prospect even more terrifying.
Monk thought, monk didn’t remember…
There are people who exist with a syndrome where they have nearly perfect memory recall of their lived life and can remember nearly every moment of their lives very clearly.
Most of the people who live with it do not enjoy the experience.
Surprisingly, forgetting is a necessary and healthy thing, especially when it comes to things like traumatic experiences.
There’s actually been several social scientists who claim that the permanent memory of the internet is extremely damaging to young people because they literally cannot escape every deeply embarrassing mistake they made in their youth. It follows them, haunts them, colors every aspect of their life, especially if the embarrassing moment causes bullying against the young person, leaving them constantly afraid of someone noticing them lest that person bully them for their past embarrassments. They advocate the idea that society and humans need to be able to forget to have healthy lives.
Surprisingly, forgetting is a necessary and healthy thing, especially when it comes to things like traumatic experiences.
I have this nightmare of a traumatic experience when I was around 5-7 when I was just outside alone, after being in a fight with my brother, and my parents were at work, and I was still too afraid to go home. So I was alone for several hours wandering around tge city. (Stupid thing to do, but I was a kid and my brother was, in my mind, the danger)
I mean… I just…
Idk…
That could never be forgotten.
And I’m not sure I want to forget. Or if I could even forget.
Does forgetting that really improve my life?
It just lets my guard down around family members.
The other event is the unjustified arrest incident. I mean am I supposed to pretend that didn’t happen and that the cops are the good guys? Sorry I think I’m gonna need that memory.
Without the memories, I can’t navigate life and avoid the dangers.
Amnesia is my #1 fear
Meh, you won’t know what you forgot. And when you die you won’t know how it’s all gone. Best bet is to have kids - tell them your stories when they’re young (and can’t runaway). They’ll remember for a bit and tell their kids. In a way your memories will last forever.
Meh, you won’t know what you forgot.
Yeah but you might know that you forgot, and that you used to know.
Imagine one day looking at your kid and having no idea what their name is. You know you should know, you know you used to know, but now it’s gone.
That, but with everything important in your life. Scares the shit out of me!
