• WrenFeathers@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    No Dr. House?

    And Oz should be right on top of the Run For Your Life because he’s not fictional and should know better.

  • BambiDiego@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    How in the heckin’ is JD below a dwarf, a mad scientist tinkerer, and a random catchy band?

    He is a caring, trained, and competent doctor who will put his pride and personal life aside to help a patient.

    • Cypher@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      Given the same medical technology I would place JD the highest and furthest right.

      Not just because I like the character but because he truly does give a shit about his patients.

      • CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        Dr. Strange should have more formal training for his surgery specialty. Did JD specialize or did he just stay in internal medicine?

        • Cypher@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          Dr. Strange, if he’s practicing medicine, might decide not to try and save you (he was a neurosurgeon IiRC) because it would hurt his stats.

          JD would try.

          I honestly can’t recall if JD specialised.

          • CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            But that’s the Y axis. Training is on the X. As a neurosurgeon, he’s had at least 2 more years of training than JD, possibly a lot more.

            • Cypher@lemmy.world
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              2 months ago

              I don’t know if Dr. Strange would technically be lower because he hasn’t been practicing for a long time? But I see what you mean.

        • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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          2 months ago

          Internal medicine, and then eventually started teaching medical school classes too. Yes, I did watch the shitty Scrubs final season reboot.

          • CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world
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            2 months ago

            So Dr. Strange is trained in neurosurgery, which is a 7 year residency compared to 3-4 years for internal medicine. He may have also done a neurosurgery fellowship for 2 years.

            • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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              2 months ago

              He definitely should be higher than J.D. if we’re going just by special issues. I would rather have him overseeing my brain surgery than J.D.

              But if I was in the hospital for a more common ailment, I’ll take an expert in internal medicine over a neurosurgeon.

              In fact, if I was in the hospital for, for example, getting poisoned by something and no one can figure out what, I’d pick an expert in internal medicine over a neurosurgeon.

      • TheRealKuni@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        He wasn’t to blame, though he easily could’ve been. That was death was the radiologist’s fault though, IIRC.

  • FMT99@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    6 years of evil medical school doesn’t qualify as professional credentials? Also I’d put Dr. Phil below most of these guys, although maybe slightly above Hannibal Lector still.

  • Stern@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    For reference on the no training side:

    Dr. Dre and Dr. Venture: Both possess honorary doctorates. The former from UCLA, the latter from a Tijuana community college.
    Dr. Pepper: Charles T. Pepper did have a medical doctorate. He is cited as a possible source of the name.
    Dr. Evil: Evil medical school.
    Zoidberg: Claims he lost it in a volcano, more likely a art history degree.
    Dr. Horrible: Likely physics though he claims Horribleness (though it could be a catchphrase.)
    Dr. Seuss: Intended to get a Doctorate of Philosophy, got an honorary doctorate of Humane Letters.
    The Doctor: Per This - While pretending to be the Doctor in an effort to save herself from an army of Cybermen, one of the planet’s deadliest enemies, in Death in Heaven, Clara said: ‘I don’t even really have a doctorate. Well Glasgow University, but then I accidentally graduated in the wrong century.’
    Doc: Does become a doctor at Storybrooke hospital in a live action show, “Once Upon a Time”, apparently not a surgeon though.
    Spin Doctors: No doctors.

    I feel like a fair amount of those on the trained side aren’t medical doctors (Phil, Ock, Robotnik, Lector, Honeydew) or at the very least, aren’t folks you’d want around for your heart attack.

    • Skullgrid@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      yes, but his hands broke in an accident. Not sure how good he is with his hands on medical equipment/psychically controlling medical tools

      • idiomaddict@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        I thought he willed himself back to full dexterity, but I also didn’t really pay attention to the movie, to be fair.

        • WolfLink@sh.itjust.works
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          2 months ago

          He learned to magic because he thought it would let him fix his hands. Instead he learned the guy who he thought fixed his legs with magic just uses magic to control his non-functional legs.

          So he probably could do surgery but he’d probably magically control the needle instead of holding it or something. Maybe.

  • Itdidnttrickledown@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    Dr Oz and Dr Phil are not doctors and should be to the left and south of Dr Pepper. Neither has a license and both are so full of shit their advice has probably killed people.

    • chatokun@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      2 months ago

      Oz is a Doctor, and was a very good one who got corrupted in his aim for fame and fortune. Part of his tragedy is that if he’d shut up and just do his actual doctor work only he’d be a benefit to society, not the detriment he is now. It’s important to know that he’s worse because he had actual skill as a heart surgeon. Quoting wiki:

      In 1982, he received his undergraduate degree in biology magna cum laude[3] at Harvard University.[31] … In 1986, he obtained MD and MBA degrees from the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine[30] and Penn’s Wharton School.[34][35]

      Edit: also, as far as I can tell, still performing heart surgeries, so should still be licensed. Still a piece of shit who should stick to surgeries. Lots of people good at 1 thing think they’re geniuses at everything.

  • tiramichu@lemm.ee
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    2 months ago

    Doctor Evil didn’t go to Evil Medical School for six years to be put in the section with no training, thank you very much!

  • WanderingVentra@lemm.ee
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    2 months ago

    Why is Doctor Strange to the left of JD from Scrubs? Isn’t he a world renown surgeon or something? Does that count for less because he hasn’t had medical practice lately?

    • CookieOfFortune@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      Not to mention less formal training than Dr. Quinn? At least he’s studied modern medicine and has specialty years after surgery residency.

    • mipadaitu@lemmy.world
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      2 months ago

      Dr. Strange had his injury in 1963, he probably went through medical school in the 1950’s and has been studying magic, not medicine ever since. His techniques and knowledge are extremely out of date.

    • Queen HawlSera@lemm.ee
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      2 months ago

      Probably the same reason Zoidberg is considered to be on the same level of medical competence as Dr. Dre (Zoidberg literally doesn’t know human anatomy), and a higher one than Dr. Pepper (Which is genuinely responsible for less death than Zoidberg is), and Dr. Evil (Went to Evil Medical School)

      And even then all of these people are probably better doctors than Doc, the dwarf who lived back in the days when washing your hands was considered a “Rookie mistake no self-respecting gentleman in the medical profession would ever make”

      And the Medical Profession consisted of people wearing scary crow masks who just spread disease around and kill people, fully believing that disease was caused by not saying “Bless you” when someone sneezes

      • finitebanjo@lemmy.world
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        2 months ago

        No but he would try to scam and gaslight me or exploit me in some other manner. If the setting is a regular checkup I’ll trust Robotnik more. Ah, but the chart explicitly says trusting life with and not livelihood so I guess you’ve got me there.

  • Flying Squid@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    I would trust J.D. with my life way over Dr. Seuss.

    J.D. is a fool, but he’s also a really good doctor.

  • omega_x3@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    There is no way Dr. Mario has any training. He just throws random pills at the problems hoping that they line up and do something other than cause an overdose.

    • mindaika@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      2 months ago

      Bruh… that’s literally what doctoring is now. Got the hurt? Pain pills. Got the sad? SSRIs. Got two, three, four sets of titties? Ozempic!