Rude is the coworker who thinks their shirts meant to antagonize anyone left of the US version of “center” are hilarious, rude are the coworkers who talk shit about trans people on break, rude are those who spend every conversation saying “mentally ill people should be locked up and oh by the way trans people are mentally ill”, rude are the ones who make the LGBTQ employees scared that one day they’ll just come to work and find a parking lot full of people waiting to jump them because the government said it’s legal.
I consider myself quite polite when these things happen in my workplace and I’m not slashing tires or torching cars, and instead all I do is say “hey that’s not okay and here’s why…”
Doesn’t stop HR from coming and telling me I need to be respectful of my coworkers opinions. (HR guy is a democrat, but like… One of those “if you’re being oppressed please resist quietly and peacefully within the confines of the oppressive laws made specifically to target you” kind of liberals)
Remember kids: the standard you walk past is the standard you accept.
Yeah I got pulled into a meeting with HR for not respecting the opinions of a flat earther. He was the most useless most passive drone I’ve ever met.
At one point turned his screen upside down and he tried to work with that for a week before he asked IT about it.
Has a “we’re coworkers, not friends” mentality
And if you don’t, you’re a child looking for friends in the wrong places.
Wym?
Work isn’t really the place to be searching for friends
we’re social animals. you can meet friends everywhere. claiming you can’t do it in the one place you spend most of your waking hours is ridiculous. work is probably the most common way people make friends.
I didn’t say you can’t make friends at work. More that you shouldn’t be searching for friends at work.
I’ve made plenty of good friends at work, but it is not the default expectation. You clock in, do your job, clock out, get paid. If you end up working well with someone and become friends, cool.
And that’s the basis of what “professionalism” is. You should be able to work with anyone that’s not an outright jerk, and if you find someone you like working with, that’s even better!
Gotcha. I don’t think being sociable and open to friendships at work is “looking”. I can also see how it could clash with someone’s boundaries. In any case holding a grudge about being rejected is bad form.
if someone thinks that’s rude, they were lucky to have no actually rude coworkers.
i had some who would change other peoples chair adjustments every day, steal food, poison other peoples plants or boop passing by coworkers in the sides/ribs forcefully when passing by.
Or they were those actually rude coworkers themselves.
That’s not rude, that’s cruisin’ for bruisin’
Any of that would get HR involved immediately at my company, and probably fired. We recently fired a VP over sexual harassment (no details), but given our other policies, I’m guessing it was pretty tame by other companies’ standards.
I hope others here work in halfway decent companies as well.
“Vague answers about weekend plans”
I’m having a lesbian three-way this weekend boss HBU
I don’t see the issue. Tell him/her/them that!
yes 🙂↕️🖐️
“Just a three way? Gotta pump those numbers up!”
it’s not rude but you will be an outcast because of it
we’re social animals, if you don’t show yourself as part of the pack you’ll be treated as an other - with suspicion and distance. it’s much better to first show that you want to be part of the pack, and then establish yourself as someone who keeps to themselves. this way you’ll get even more peace and quiet, because people you’re on friendly terms are more likely to respect your personal space
this is the difference between “that lonely guy over there (he likes peace, but is nice)” and “that lonely guy over there (he creeps me out)”
Some people are, some people aren’t. Plenty of us aren’t pack creatures and we don’t associate with pack-minded people.
Any group or community that forks a ‘pack’ is one I immediately leave. I refuse to be dragged down into that nonsense and tribalism. It most often becomes abusive and coercive eventually.
Heck, are you even human? Homo sapiens?
We survive on group dinâmica and tribalism. To not do that makes it sound as if you were some weird alien or an hominid that somehow escaped the great genetic purge our ancestors carried generations ago.
every human is a pack animal, this is not a matter of personality but of our genetic make up. if you weren’t a pack animal your mother would’ve thrown you out of the house when you were max ~4 years old so you could go fend for yourself
Some people aren’t pack animals - isn’t it wild how diverse the human species is! Lol it’s on you if you’re guilty of thinking these people are a problem.
every human is a pack animal, this is not a matter of personality but of our genetic make up. if you weren’t a pack animal your mother would’ve thrown you out of the house when you were max ~4 years old so you could go fend for yourself
Autistic people aren’t pack animals.
my many autistic friends woild beg to differ
again, i don’t mean “oh i prefer to be alone :)” i mean the genetic quality of the human race. if you’re interested i suggest you look up what behaviours pack animals (other than humans) exhibit, because no matter how edgy and lonely you want to feel - you are a pack animal
There are shocker different types of humans. I’m not disputing they are mainly pack animals only that it’s not “the only” thing they can be. Welcome to the diverse beautiful world we live in
my guy, that doesn’t change the fact that we’re all human. your argument is akin to “not all people have organs”
I’m more than happy to be treated as ‘the other’
ASSIMILATE
I got the ass, wanna imilate me?
A job would feel a lot longer if I wasn’t on friendly terms with my coworkers
You can be friendly without being actual friends. I prefer not to make actual friends at work, the exception being once I’m no longer working with I’m more likely to spend time with them socially. I never understand why people get so upset when you don’t want to be friends; they interpret that as “you must hate me if you don’t want to be my friend”. No, I just have a finite amount of time and energy for friends.
My performance is not based on friendship stats like some kind of dating sim.
Also, sometimes I dont want the psychic weight of having to take my friend over the coals for violating safety procedure. I also dont want my friend doing overtime he really doesnt want to do because he knows I need it done. Work is work and work is purely transactional.
I can absolutely be friends, but if you cant accept that its entirely seperate to work. We arent.
That really does suck when work obligations can be in conflict with genuine friendships. A big part of why I prefer to keep things separate.
There are really touchy-feely workplaces where most of all that just isn’t an option. I’ve worked at such places and I’m still traumatized.
At the height of the lockdowns I used to work in an advertising agency and it was like that. Because of the lockdowns we all have to work remotely and I got so much more done because I wasn’t constantly being asked questions about my life, favourite sports teams, and my opinion of whatever the latest office drama was.
Only partially were they actually doing their job of trying to advertise a crappy one-star hotel as a holiday villa. I think it ended up getting called something like hideaway lodge, or something equally original.
Bit of a hot take, but I prefer the version where you get less done because you’re spending so much time shooting the shit with coworkers
I don’t enjoy work. I do enjoy hanging out with people and chatting. If I can get away with it, I’ll minimize the work and maximize the non-work
But the problem is if you don’t do the work the client doesn’t pay the money. It probably works better if your salaried.
Im all of that and everyone in the office like me, not kidding. You can be all of that without being rude, you can give people distance and speak to them, you can spend your lunch breaks at the car or go home and still say “see u soon”… Manners matter people, a lot
Yep, there’s keeping work and private life separate and then there’s making it a personality trait und looking down on people who don’t.
People are social animals, being smug about actively rejecting social interactions is unlikely to elicit positive reactions, but with some people it occasionally feels like they’re getting confirmation for whatever from that situation.
I’ll never understand why it offends people that my job is just a job. It is not a social space for me. It’s a place of employment where I exchange my time and skills for a paycheck and healthcare.
I guess other people lack imagination to realize other people are different than them and have different values/priorities in life. I have family whose entire social/romantic life was co-mingled with their work life to the point they had zero friends outside of their company and would stop being friends with people who quit. Creepy and weird AF if you ask me.
I just want to get through he day so I can go live in my life. The fewer interactions I have means the faster the day goes. I also each lunch at my desk because it means I get to go home earlier. But often in my city I meet people who boast about working 60 hour weeks for no overtime pay. It’s wild. They let their pride/identity be used to exploit them.
And frankly WFH boosted my productivity like 500% and has meant I’ve gotten three promotions in 5 years and more than doubled my salary. None of that would have happened working in the office where people constantly kept coming up to me to ask for ‘favors’ that were never recorded and got pissed off when I told them to go back to their desk and write it up in an email.
Most people can’t stand the 8-10 hour workdays. They try to make up for it by not trying to look at it as work, and judge anybody who does because it makes them realize that truth.
probably. i don’t smile much and i’m quite happy and it seems to drive people into a rage when they ask me why I don’t smile and I tell them I don’t to fake it to make it. at least in american culture, if you are smiling constantly you are apparently horrible and depressed.
def not true of other cultures though. I lived in Germany for awhile, and they think the American obsession with smiling is utterly bizarre.
I am this guy.
I don’t see the point in pretending we give a shit about each other’s lives. It’s nothing personal, I’m just not one for pretense.
I kind of get the meme, sometimes doing small talk and little things for each other makes work less tedious and keeps the vibe up.
Oh for sure, but as someone on the other end of things, it’s mildly exhausting to keep managing social interactions, especially if I’m already tapped out. It’s not always unwelcome, but I’m very happy doing my work just chilling as well.
I think they give the game away by listing being neurodivergent as a negative. A negative which is in and of itself “rude”.
“Your brain processes information differently to mine? That’s rude! Why would you deliberately annoy me like that?”
One of my coworkers is very transparent when they’ve exhausted their social battery, and it’s great!
My people
Finally a greentext that isn’t fake!
And gay
That’s not amusing, that’s depressing.
