Finally, a razor that’s specialized for shaving assholes!
Jeremy’s Rectal Razors
What about:
That’s not a razor.
THIS is a razor.
You call that a spoon?
This is a spoon! 🥄
I see you’ve played knifey-spooney before…
What’s funny about that scene, is he hides his actual razor and starts shaving with the blade when he has an audience.
And that’s why he’s not toxic. He may be a bit of a trickster, but he lets the movie audience in on the joke.
Crocodile Dundee was legitimately a brilliant character, the total lack of ego was a brilliant aspect of that.
Met people that say these “woke” companies shouldn’t get political but they will happily buy from companies like this. Isn’t surprising at all.
It is so tempting to start some idiot MAGA hat brand like this and then give all the profits to trans rights groups etc
“Uncle Cletus’s 400 grit toilet paper”
Are you tired of those ‘woke’ and cushy liberal toilet paper made from weak and pansy processed cellulose? Try Uncle Cletus’s proprietary silicon carbide formula enhanced with sand sourced from All American beaches! Now you can show your patriotism by bleeding red from the ass during every trump-approved toilet visit
Just as an aside, been a 49ers fan my whole life. This whole recent “white guy in a red cap” thing makes me wish I had two more hands so I could give four middle fingers.
But dude, liberal tears butt wipes or whatever…these rubes eat that shit up
Not sure why a for profit corporation would limit its market to a specific, politically oriented, demographic. Especially when that corporations product is body hair removal - a process very much detached from all political and most social discourse.
Along these lines, there is no stupider entry in the American index than that of “Jeremy’s Razors,” a grooming company created by The Daily Wire, a conservative media platform founded in 2015 by Ben Shapiro (a political commentator you may have heard of) and Jeremy Boreing (a former film director you probably haven’t heard of, and the namesake for the venture).
This is a fucking Ben Shapiro product lmao
They probably have another brand which appeals only to gender fluid save the whales hippies.
You joke but they almost certainly do. Why sell something to one group when you can repackage it and sell it to two different groups? And the “women’s” version is usually marked up for no reason.
I was joking but not really. It’s what I would be doing if I were them.
I only sell my axis-themed WW2 memorabilia flags to white men with hereditary or other baldness. They need to be at least
lifts arm with palm flat
This tall.
There is an entire coffee company dedicated to mUrica. It’s just fucking coffee but if you sell it right these idiots will buy literally anything that even pretends they be American and conservative
It’s because they’ve conditioned their audience to believe a few key things:
- “Voting” with your wallet is what matters over all other forms of action.
- Giving money to “woke” companies harms you as an individual.
- Buying products is the best way to signal your value as a person.
Let’s break that down.
They want money to be more important than voting, because they understand that their political demographic does not win the popular vote in most cases, and their policies are inherently not popular with the majority. But when they can get money instead, then use that to influence votes and policy, well, that just might get them the policies they want without substantial votes from the public.
They want people to fear giving money to “woke” corporations because it makes them seem like the only source of real truth, and objectivity. They’re the voices of reason in a world that’s all against you. Then, you’ll be willing to pay for their subscription streaming service, and their subscription streaming service for kids, and their merch, and their chocolate, and their razors, et cetera et cetera.
They want you to associate buying products as the way to define yourself, because when you so strongly identify with their politics, you’ll spend as much money as you can signaling to those around you that you don’t support the “woke” agenda through your wallet, you only support those who truly embody your cause. Giving them money becomes a symbol of your values.
And of course, they wouldn’t get any sales without this as a selling point. If they just start a razor brand, not affiliated with their political ventures, who’s gonna buy? Their razors are effectively the same price as Gilette’s, just without the likely higher standard of quality and availability in physical retail locations.
But when they combine all three of those tactics I mentioned to make their target demographic believe they need these razors to display their values, stop a perceived evil agenda, and make their voice heard… well, then you’ve got a good revenue stream.
It’s also funny because most of my heavy conservative coworkers all have beards, trucks, and country stuff because that’s the image.
Now that I think about it, quite a few are bald and shave their heads, sooo… Maybe that’s an angle they could shoot for? Those could be some wild ads.
I just had a look at their website, it’s pretty clear the whole thing is a pisstake. All part of the show.
King Gillette was woke as fuck.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/King_C._Gillette#Personal_life
Didn’t even build me up for it. Right at the first sentence.
Now that’s an American.
Too bad the modern company probably isn’t lead with his principles.
The best a man can get
Please tell me this is satire.
Not only is it not, its not even the only product marketed this way. Off the top of my head I’ve heard of anti woke coffee, beer, phones, foods… I don’t remember what any of them are called because that’s not a good use of brain space.
I’m gonna make some tooth brushes in two marginally different styles and sell one in rainbow and various LGBT flag patterns for the left and sell the other in camo, thin blue line flag and gun metal grey patterns for the right. Market the hell out of both of them based solely on being ideologically polarized to those each side hates. Milk everyone on both sides of their cash. And when they finally inevitably find out that they’re both produced by the same company, I’ll gamify it, posting weekly sales totals for each line and promising 20% of the profits at the end of the year get donated the a non-profit supported by the winning side. Let them fight each other by paying me. Also, no matter how overwhelming one side was actually winning, my posts would always indicate that it is a really close race, so that if just a few more people bought them, it might make a big difference.
That’s all bullshit, I’d never do that because I’m not evil. But dozens of Libertarian sociopaths are taking notes right now.
I’d never do that because it sounds like a lot of work and you’d probably just get bought out or run out of business by Colgate or the other big companies.
LOL monster
…profitable monster… the most cunning ones are
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Black Rifle coffee, I’m assuming. The American coffee with guns on the cans.
Kyle rittenhouse’s coffee of choice!
I actually bought a bag of their beans after they publically distanced themselves from him. It wasn’t bad I guess, nothing spectacular. Although I’m giving up coffee slowly, probably wont buy another bag.
Caffienated coffee should be woke 😂
Starbucks goes pretty left. Shops generally speaking idk i think you’re right…now the roasters, the bean brokers, the plantations…I’ve seen bits of left ideology here & there. The main thing I care about is: can you make a good bean? Does it taste good? There was one bean out of Africa, had all this FairTrade feel-good stuff behind it. Tasted a cup of the brew & I’m like…pack it up, boys. This isn’t even good coffee. ¯\(°_o)/¯
Starbucks is the poster boy for saying one thing and doing another. Their marketing and damage control cost less than accepting employee demands.
Oh idk about all of that. I don’t go to Char bucks unless I have to. I do know this: holy shit they have some good benefits for their employees. I think they pay well for schooling, and I know for a fact a young man quit his job at a lumberyard to become a Starbucks barista. Why? Among other things, to get good healthcare for his entire fucking family. By being a Starbucks barista!
…it doesn’t really make sense to me, either, but he did what he had to do & seemed generally happy with the arrangement.
anti-woke coffee made by A.I. on the blockchain
I knew it wasn’t. But I was holding out for the tiniest sliver of hope.
It’s definitely satire, have a look at their ads. It’s just a giant pisstake.
What the fuck even is ‘liberal corporate culture’?
Corporate culture everywhere is 100% regressive hierarchies.
It’s a marketing term that appeals to a subset of the American customer demographic.
Marketing is psychological witchcraft posing as hard science
I’m not saying I’m immune from propaganda but I didn’t think I’ve ever purchased something to “strike back at the conservative corporate culture.”
I mean it’s pretty common. I’ve not eaten at Chick Fil A for years or shopped in a Hobby Lobby since the religious health insurance crap. Just two big examples. Many people choose to not support companies that are in blatant opposition to their values. And me not buying at hobby lobby did mean I purchased my supplies from an alternate vendor. So I could say I bought from alternate vendor to strike back at the conservative culture…
Interesting that they target “manly, conservative men”… yet they look like they’re made of the saem cheap, shitty plastic most other disposable/cartridge razors use. And look at the ergonomic design… dont want their manly wittle hands cramping.
Politics aside, fuck cartridge razors and fuck products designed to generate trash.
The razors are actually pretty good. They’re solidly on-par with comparable brands. All designs should be ergonomic, human friendly.
I generally agree, I love me a good DE safety razor. 👍🏻
Liberal corporate culture 🤯
How else would you explain those companies that put a rainbow on their logo for a few weeks every year?
How else would you explain those companies that put a rainbow on their logo for a few weeks every year?
Perforative rainbow washing? 95% of those companies still donate to GOP candidates that fight gay and trans rights every step of the way.
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Oh. Doy. I completely missed that you were joking. Today is not my sharpest day.
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I still use single and twin blades. 3 and up are just sales gimmicks.
I’ve always found the Mach 3 to be the best shave, but I think it had more to do with the open back that keeps it from getting clogged than is does with the third blade.
When the Mach 3 launched, the women in my family were taking the mens’ razors and saying how crappie their own women’s razors were. The Mach 3 was a big hit.
I still use it myself. I shave my head and the 3 blades is much easier to clean out. I do use a safety razor on my head first to do most of the work because the blades are dirt cheap. About £11 for 100 and they are made by Gillette as well. I bought these blades years ago and still got about 15 left.
I use the Mach 3 to go over again to catch any hair I may have missed. I use it on my neck as well. Those multi-blades are a gimmick and I swear it’s to drive up prices.
I also use shaving oil instead of gel or cream. A single bottle lasts me months, a big saving there as well.
Does Gillette still send razors to men randomly on their 18th bday?
First I’ve heard of it.
But then again I grew up in South Africa, I doubt Gillette would send us anything for free.
It is a smart way to get young men hooked on their product so that they never try the competition. The blades I use are Astra which are made by the same company making Gillette blades, Procter & Gamble.
Hell, I actually did some work at their factory in Berlin many years ago and they were very specific about their name, it was drilled into me to use ‘&’ and not ‘and’.
I only use single blades. All other arrangements are designed to fail by being gunked up with trapped hair.
I use single blade disposable bics and have no complaints.
My twin does that too a bit more than the single. So i keep a couple inches of water in the sink to swish them out for continued use. Hasnt failed me yet
The 2+ blade setups wouldn’t have to. But they are designed such that the blade spacing matches the thickness of a whisker, ensuring they catch hair. Space those blades out another millimeter, and the problem goes away.
I use one bic for about a year. So about once a decade, I spend $5 on razors
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Well, buy what you think works best for you is all i can say. Anything more than a twin blade is just a waste of time to me as i can get baby smooth with a single properly weilded
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This is where a bunch of American Lemmintons get confused because they’ve misunderstood what liberalism is all along, thanks to their media telling them anti-woke conservatives are “libs”.
I don’t understand why this is a shitpost? I mean, other than it’s shit, and here it is being posted. Shouldn’t a shitpost have some sort of intelligence or self-awareness or humor or something? I don’t get it.
Shitposting is just default lemmy community now
It is kinda funny though
You’ll find that a lot of posts around here aren’t shitposts
This is some absolutely god tier shitposting, taking the piss out of conservatives. I recommend taking a look at their website, it’s amazing.
And also liberals.
