You know, like “always split on 18,” or “having kids is the most rewarding thing you can do in life.”
What’s that one bit of advice you got from a trusted friend that you know deep, deep down would just ruin your thing?
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“Choose a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life.”
or
“Do what you’re passionate about.”
Just no. Most things I like don’t pay well and I started to resent the others while doing them professionally. Turning your hobby into your job is like setting your favorite song as your alarm. That’s my experience at least.
Turning your hobby into your job is like setting your favorite song as your alarm.
That’s an excellent analogy, I’m going to steal it
I used to love computers and technology. Now I get an idea about something I want to do, regurgitate a bit, shudder, and quickly throw that idea on the shelf.
I can’t even stand looking at the inside of a computer these days. It was 3/4 of my personality when I was younger.
That analogy is perfect.
I love my job, I really do, but I wouldn’t do it as a hobby. I don’t think it’s so much advice about making your hobbies a career, as it is about finding work you enjoy.
Video games, skateboarding, riding a motorcycle, all things I love, but no way I’d try to make a living at any of them.
Same. I used to do something similar to my job as a hobby but now I just don’t get on my actual computer outside of work unless I’m playing a game.
I tried building guitars for others but found that I don’t like doing things to other people’s specs. So I still build for myself. Plus video games, motorcycles, playing guitar, tabletop games, and one rotating flavor of the month hobby.
I think you and I would be friends.
Yeah, I think that a lot of people misinterpret this since “turn hobby into job” seems to be the only way people think about it.
I like cars and work in the automotive industry, and very much enjoy what I do. I also enjoy working on cars and other mechanical things as hobbies, but would absolutely loathe being a professional mechanic or technician. There’s enough separation between what I do for fun and what I do for work that it won’t sour my hobbies, but also enough overlap that my passion for my hobbies makes work far more enjoyable.
Yep.
Doing the thing you love, as your work, is a surefire way to hate the thing you once loved.
cause a lot of that love was born from the freedom to engage with it, and the escapism that it gave you.
Both of which completely disappear if you have to do it 9-5 or starve.
But like everything, theres always the exception. There are people out there, 9-5ing every day for 30 years the thing they love with no burnout… and they are usually the ones held up as examples, not the 100,000 other people who tried it, burnt out, and hated everything.
I’m doing what I love as my career, but it was a hard road to get here. I started off out of high school as a professional photographer, never charged enough, didn’t know how to run a business, got burnt out, didn’t touch a camera for a few years, then after some desk jobs, realized photography was the only career for me. I decided to do it right this time, took business courses and prayed I didn’t end up hating it again. It’s worked out for me so far.
Couldn’t agree more. I decided to become a chef as my career of choice after school, cause I liked cooking. Can’t remember me cooking at home once in the three years of my training and the year I worked the job afterwards. Now I love it again and cook (almost) exclusively for my wife and me.
Liking your job is cool but making your hobby your job and still keeping it as a hobby works out for a very small minority of people. For most it either destroys your hobby or you start resenting yout job.
“Just be yourself”
Ask any neurodivergent person how that goes.
We mask because we are often punished for being ourselves most of the time.
As a religious trans person, it’s deeply insulting how many anti-trans religious authorities say things like “don’t let the world tell you who you are, trust in the voice of God in your own heart” or something, and then go all surprised Pikachu when I’m still trans afterwards.
Growing up I was constantly told to try to be like someone else, because I’m too weird.
“Never give up”.
Sometimes you’re wasting your time and should give up. Better advice would be “decide how much you’re willing to give to this before you start”.
“All kids think they are smarter than their parents.” - my father, constantly growing up
What I learned: Never tell anyone else how to think or feel about anything. Anyone that tries to shape your thinking directly is a fool.
Intelligence is like beauty, we don’t have a very good frame of reference to perceive ourselves. Physical beauty is largely measured by the reactions of others. Like beauty, intelligence has many facets. However my favorite measuring stick is curiosity. This is how I overcame my father’s admonition; while curiosity does not guarantee intelligence, an intelligent person is always curious.
Nah… if someone keeps trying to stick a fork in the light socket or tries to hurt other people, I think its pretty justified to try to change the thinking that leads to that behavior.
Being curious doesn’t some how prevent you from having common sense
The fact that you dont seem to understand why trying to stop someone from “sticking a fork in a light socket” might be a good idea is concerning.
The concerning part is your idiotic assertions
The response is a purposeful obtuse way to make a binary snide comment. These one comment judgments are tired and just not a good way to grade much. Be more creative at least.
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Just be yourself.
There is a reason people hide who they really are until you get to know them.
All those who say [insert random hardship here] “builds character”. It’s not uncommon for me to respond with “what’s in it for me?”
The Venn diagram for “advice” and “bad advice” is almost a perfect circle. In general, advice is only good if three conditions are met:
- it was requested or at least clearly implied to be welcome.
- it’s given under a solid grasp of the situation, or after some serious thought.
- it’s not assumptive in nature. And, if generalising, it takes into account that generalisations fail.
Those sayings - like in the OP - almost always violate #2 and #3. And usually #1, as it’s that sort of thing that people vomit on your face when they’re really, really eager to treat you like cattle to be herded.
Okay… example. Right. Acquaintance of mine saying that I should work with computers - because I use Linux, because I can recover a password, because I can spend ten minutes (I’m not exaggerating) trying to parse what he’s asking help with. Under that “if u like it than make it you’re job! lol” approach.
Yeah… nah.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
“be yourself” doesn’t work if your natural self is bad.
You mean the person that got me into this mess in the first place?
Ehhh it depends. For a work interview or anything professional, you can take it until you make it. But when socializing however you should be yourself.
People can tell when you are trying to be somebody you aren’t, and people are most comfortable around those who are open about who they are.
Most chess advice. It teaches you to think in simple terms without actually thinking about a position. It’s good if you want to get passably good, but it’s a handicap once you improve.
That applies to most fields, doesn’t it? Any heuristic will be a simplification and becoming an expert in any domain involves knowing when you can apply a heuristic or approximation or model and when you cannot.
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Neither of these is dead wrong but were rules of thumb that oversimplify changing and complex issues in the US:
“stay away from credit cards” - often prevents people from actually learning about how underlying mechanisms of loans, interest, credit ratings, and budgeting work. There are definitely people incapable of having access to credit and not spending it, so the saying may be true for a subset but if you always pay your bill in full on time and just use autopay so you don’t forget, you’re leaving 1-5% annual rebate for almost all your spend on the table. If you play credit card churning games, much more.
“The only things worth going into debt for are a home and education.” - while accurate in the US for decades, the applicability or even accuracy of this statement is now dubious depending on many factors: career field and interests for education; interest rates, geography and housing prices for homes.
“stay away from credit cards”
I followed this advice in my youth. Never applied for a credit card, never took out a loan, never bought anything I couldn’t afford to drop cash on. I thought it would show I’m fiscally responsible because I’m not accruing debt.
Then I got an opportunity to work a govt job providing communications for the White House; basically, following the president around and ensuring he’s able to communicate at press events, etc. I applied for the job and was told I was their #1 candidate…
…But they ran a credit check on me and was surprised when they got zero results. I proudly stated that I’ve never been in debt before, so my credit risk is zero. But according to them, zero credit history is shady as fuck. They said they couldn’t tell how well I manage money because there’s no history showing regular, on-time payments on credit cards, loans, etc.
They couldn’t tell if I had trouble managing money or not. That made me a potential bribe risk. Someone could offer me tons of money to slip a bomb into the president’s podium, or let a suspicious character into the White House, and if I’m hurting enough for money, they suspect I might be willing to do it.
Literally, my entire history of service in the govt had no bearing on my loyalty. Only my credit score. I lost that job opportunity because I was fiscally responsible.
I went out and got a credit card that same day. I now have an extremely high credit score, which I keep up by paying all my bills and utilities on credit, then paying off almost all of it at the end of the month. I think it’s stupid that I need to put myself in debt, then pay my way out of it over time, spending even more money in the long run, just to prove I’m fiscally responsible. That should prove that I suck at managing money, not the other way around. But that’s the broken system we have today.
I’m confused - you pay off almost all of your credit card and you’re “spending even more money in the long run”. Why not just pay off all of it? Surely if you were able to afford your bills with cash, you’d be able to pay off your credit card in full every month since the bills would be the same?
If you want good credit, you don’t pay it all off. You need recurring payments over time. If I pay it all off at once, then my credit score doesn’t go up much at all. But if there’s a constant debt on my card and I’m never late in paying at least the minimum required each month, then my credit score skyrockets quickly.
This is why the system is garbage. You need to spend more money to show you’re excellent at managing money. It’s a dumb system that makes no sense.
I pay almost everything off because it minimizes the interest I have to pay while keeping a line of credit running on the card. But it’s important to keep that line of credit active, or else your credit score stagnates.
Isn’t that just not true?
https://www.capitalone.com/learn-grow/money-management/credit-myths/
Myth No. 5: You have to carry a credit card balance to build credit
If you don’t pay your credit card balance in full, it’s carried over to the next billing cycle and considered a revolving balance. And that unpaid balance might accrue interest.
You don’t need to carry a balance to build credit. According to the CFPB, “Paying off your credit cards in full every month is the best way to improve a credit score or maintain a good one.”
Fact No. 5: You don’t have to carry a credit card balance to build credit
While carrying a balance isn’t necessary to build credit, a healthy credit utilization ratio—which measures how much available credit a person is using—is an important part of credit.
In addition to paying off credit card balances in full every month, the CFPB recommends keeping a credit utilization rate of less than 30% of your available credit. That can be a way to show you’re responsible with credit.
I pay my credit cards in full every month and accrue zero interest and have excellent credit…
I’ve got a high credit score and I’ve never not paid it off in full. It’s only really ever went up over the years, with the occasional tiny 1-3 digit drop. I’d never pay interest I don’t need to in exchange for a higher rating; they’ve got enough money.
Only pay off what is due, not the full balance. So if I spent 100 on my cc last month and then 100 this month. My bill is for 100, but my balance is 200. Pay the 100, incur no interest.
Edit: by “what is due” I mean the full balance from the previous month, not the minimum payment.
Anything about god taking you to and through things, or prayer. How’s that working for Ukraine or Gaza or a ton of other places with war, famine, violence, trafficking, etc.? Also, anything that refers to “fighting” cancer or other diseases - too bad your person is gone because they didn’t fight harder.
This reminds me of this story about the concentration camps. “If there is a god they will have to beg for our forgiveness”
That isn’t even “good advice that is really bad advice”, that’s just plain bad advice.
USE LINUX.
when can it be bad?
When we already know linux is available (as everybody on these forums knows) but for valid reasons it is not an option in our particular situation.
Most one sentance advice is just a deepity
Generally, a deepity has (at least) two meanings: one that is true but trivial, and another that sounds profound, but is essentially false or meaningless and would be “earth-shattering” if true. To the extent that it’s true, it doesn’t have to matter. To the extent that it has to matter, it isn’t true (if it actually means anything). This second meaning has also been called “pseudo-profound bullshit”.
“Look before you leap” vs “He who hesitates is lost”
“Many hands make light work” vs “Too many cooks spoil the broth”
I don’t know that those have to be in conflict… If you make a 1 word change to the second. “Too many chefs spoil the broth”. Good to have extra hands helping, in almost every case - but only if the hands are well directed. If everyone thinks they’re in charge, or doesn’t know the scope of where they’re in charge, odds of success drop.
I liked it the way it was thank you. I guess too many editors spoil the sentence. ;)
“Treat others the way you want to be treated”.
Why’s that bad advice?
Spank me harder, Daddy!
You should treat people as they want to be treated.
