• thesohoriots@lemmy.worldEnglish
    1151·
    4 months ago

    Gonna take the hit on this one: a Joe Rogan bro. You probably know what I’m talking about, but to be more clear: aggro “alpha male,” gym rat or has a weirdly intense workout routine, takes a bunch of supplements, ready to believe anything pitched as “they don’t want you to know this,” weird diets of meat, “edgy” humor that’s more nodding and agreeing with prejudices than being funny, etc. Oh and listens to Joe Rogan willingly.

    • chonglibloodsport@lemmy.world
      2315·
      4 months ago

      There’s nothing toxic about working out and getting strong, taking supplements etc. As long as you’re not harming yourself or other people then I see nothing wrong with it.

      • otp@sh.itjust.works
        8·
        4 months ago

        The description wasn’t “any one of the above”, it was “all (or most) of the above”.

  • Boozilla@lemmy.worldEnglish
    861·
    4 months ago

    Customers hitting on people at their job.

    Was eating lunch at a bar one time when three dude bros came in and started hitting on the bartender. They weren’t overly aggressive but it was obnoxious.

    She handled it really well. She looked each of them in the eye, smiled, introduced herself and shook each of their hands in turn. She stated she was a professional and appreciated being treated like one. She was friendly but firm.

    Shut them right the fuck up. They behaved much better after that.

  • gedaliyah@lemmy.world
    801·
    4 months ago

    Honestly, not checking in on each other.

    There are a lot of stereotypes in this thread, and some I’ve encountered, some I haven’t. But I do know that there is an epidemic of loneliness among men, and it is very real and sometimes deadly.

      • Tyfud@lemmy.world
        3·
        4 months ago

        Of mind. Seriously. Reach out to your buddies you haven’t heard from in a few weeks. And don’t stop doing that. They’ll appreciate it, and so will you.

        • PopcornPrincess@lemmy.world
          1·
          4 months ago

          Agreed even just sending a stupid meme or a joke shows you were thinking of them and can be a lighthearted convo starter.

  • Drunemeton@lemmy.worldEnglish
    54·
    4 months ago

    Bragging about sexual conquests.

    If I wanted to know about your sex life I’d ask for your Only Fans.

  • mysoulishome@lemmy.worldEnglish
    441·
    4 months ago

    Guy at work always starts saying sexist shit when no other women are around, maybe wanting to built camaraderie or something? Toxic masculinity is a myth. Women all want the bad boys. No thanks we can avoid the 1:1 convos from now on.

    • fuckwit_mcbumcrumble@lemmy.dbzer0.comEnglish
      1·
      4 months ago

      Guy at work always starts saying sexist shit when no other women are around

      I misread that as sexiest shit at first and was super confused. “Damn they must be working with some gay ass motherfuckers.”

  • sunbrrnslapper@lemmy.world
    382·
    4 months ago

    Not a guy, but the one that really gets me is willfully incompetence - particularly around household or family chores (and the mental load associated with them).

    • rollmagma@lemmy.world
      232·
      4 months ago

      Yeah, sorry but this one is just counterproductive. Guys just don’t give a fuck. No one is going around “ooh, what if I pretend I can’t do this task so she then has to do it”. That’s just patriarchy and gender roles for you. Maybe try to have a conversation about the subject of chores without sticking the “you’re evil” tag on the other person. Well, for anything in life really. Also mental load is there for anyone, I see no point in bringing it up in this context. The dudes have to deal with a fair share of mental load as well, specially with all the emotional neglect and immaturity.

  • blackstampede@sh.itjust.works
    352·
    4 months ago

    This is a pattern I’ve seen repeatedly.

    Guys find themselves desperate to get laid, and that desperation comes across in all of their interactions with women, who don’t like feeling that they’re being treated like a vending machine, which leads to the guy being rejected for reasons that he doesn’t entirely understand.

    He gets in a relationship with someone, finally, and everything is great for a while. Then he realizes that women are talking and flirting with him more than they ever have before, and isn’t sure why, but he enjoys it. He doesn’t understand that, because he is in a relationship, he has stopped being desperate and weird, and is now actually having real conversations with women about mutually interesting topics.

    Surrounded by women that are (seemingly) available, he either breaks up with his SO, asks for some sort of open arrangement, or tries to cheat. Unfortunately, for reasons that he still doesn’t understand, as soon as he’s available for sex, women start being turned off by him again (if not to quite the degree they were before) and, again, he finds it difficult to get laid.

    From here, guys often fall into some incel-style evolutionary psychology explanation for things, regularly cheat on everyone that they’re with, or gradually becomes aware of the pattern.

    If they become aware of the pattern, they can begin to manage it and reduce the desperate, salesman vibe that they give off. As they become more confident and relaxed, it becomes clear to women that they’re perfectly comfortable going home alone or just being friends, which allows them to have more meaningful relationships and, incidentally, more sex with people they like.

    Anyway, thanks for coming to my TED Talk on the origin and mating behavior of the involuntarily celibate.

      • A Phlaming Phoenix@lemm.ee
        5·
        4 months ago

        With polyamory, Brokeback Mountain is a light hearted comedy about some queer friends who like to escape to the woods sometimes.

    • Thebeardedsinglemalt@lemmy.world
      4·
      4 months ago

      2 former coworkers of mine who always the smartest person they know. One of em lives alone and you can tell he’s never lost an argument (with himself in his head) and anytime he tries to back up his opinion it’s always the same “it’s dumb, it’s stupid, it doesn’t make sense it’s not LoGiCaL”. But anytime you try to chime in…he talks over you.

      The other is one of those “I read both sides of the story so I know far far more than you”…who was a one of those reddit knowitalls.

  • harrys_balzac@lemmy.dbzer0.com
    24·
    4 months ago

    I have a coworker who is walking checklist of toxic traits and red flags. Here are the highlights:

    • only helps attractive younger women or men who can do favors for him
    • sticks his nose into situations that he has no business with
    • tends to work on high visibility projects while ignoring his actual job
    • has a BT speaker that requires wheels and extended handle and plays his shitty music loudly
    • honestly thinks he’s all that and a bag of chips
  • cheese_greater@lemmy.world
    20·
    4 months ago

    Not understanding boundaries and not having/setting them and respecting others’.

    You don’t owe shit to anyone and if they make you feel bad, they are often manipulating you. What you choose to do needs to be a hard yes from yourself otherwise its going through motions and can often be inauthentic which is inherently harmful to your sense and integrity of Self

    People naturally test these limits and breach them all the time so it happens but you must train yourself to assert your will for yourself and how you respond to trespasses by setting those limits and then strongly upholding them when it comes time to address the opposing force, definitely for those who continue despite knowing the rules of the game you’ve set for yourself

    • Num10ck@lemmy.worldEnglish
      5·
      4 months ago

      to combine all 3 of the above, i worked with a joe rogan bro who would come up and show me a video of him having abusive sex with a hidden camera footage that the partner wasnt even aware of, to brag about his weekend conquest, then tell me how he stole her soul with surprise anal. then he dared me to show him something better next week.

    • haroldstork@lemm.eeEnglish
      3·
      4 months ago

      I’m not sure why this is a thing more men do, but I can’t agree more. Generally, I associate this kind of behavior with poor emotional intelligence so good advice for literally any kind of relationship with anyone.

  • nzeayn@lemmy.world
    20·
    4 months ago

    guys at work comlaining about their divorce to anyone entering an enclosed room. four different times when i was forced to work in an office and twice so far in slack. mother fucker i dont known you but i already get why she left. stop trying to force random people to be your therapist.

    • mke@lemmy.world
      2·
      4 months ago

      I’ve seen this, and what bothers me most is when you get that nasty feeling they’re not looking for a therapist, but validation. Yeah, your ex-wife sucked, man. She was totally in the wrong about everything always, sorry you had to deal with her for so long. I’m sure you’re in the clear and there’s nothing you could be blamed for, it’s easy to tell from this one-sided retelling of your personal conflicts.

      When anyone’s first topic of choice for casual conversation is how much their last partner was in the wrong, it’s… difficult not to be dubious.

    • AndrewZabar@lemmy.worldEnglish
      2·
      4 months ago

      Standard guy who can’t fathom the idea of changing or self-improvement. He’s never the problem.