Any recent victories or challenges?

  • DarkMessiah@lemmy.world
    121·
    10 months ago

    I can’t save money because of my home and car loans. Hell, I wouldn’t be able to eat if it weren’t for my parents helping me out with cooking cheap meals and borrowing money, which I always feel like shit for doing. My job tires me out enough that I can’t work up the energy to fight past my ADHD paralysis to job hunt for one that pays more. I can’t get a raise because of said ADHD paralysis fucking with my productivity. I also can’t work up the energy to clean up and repair enough that I could rent my place out and move back in with my parents. And selling the house is off the table—my parents are the only ones that are close enough to my work for me to be able to make it without a three hour drive, and they’ve got a full house atm.

    I was rejected for a refinance that would’ve bought me $400 a month worth of breathing room. And the energy credit is running out soon, so I’m about to start being $200-300 in the hole.

    I can’t work up the energy to go out and meet someone who could be my significant other, even if that were something I had any skill or confidence in doing.

    Hell, I look at my mates and they’ve got their shit on better lock than I do in some ways. Brian and Marcus have rented their house out and moved back in with their parents, ended up making about $400 a month in profit. Nate doesn’t even have a job, but he has a wife (which is really confusing, considering how he looks), and their combined Centrelink payments let them save up for big purchases they may need to make. Even Carol has a partner and a job at a casino making double what I do. (Names changed for privacy)

    BUT!

    I have gone through too much, survived too much to let all the effort of doing so go to waste. Even if it ends up being useless in the end, I’m going to take every opportunity I can force myself to take in order to get myself into a better place. No way in hell I’m letting the world push me into a corner without giving it a black eye on the way.

    • FireTower@lemmy.worldOP
      6·
      10 months ago

      Love the attitude in the last paragraph. I’ve got ADHD too, I find if I pick a time/day to do something (like applying to jobs) and tell someone my plan, I can force myself into not pushing it off. Applying to jobs definitely isn’t a fun experience but I recently changed jobs myself and it honestly feels refreshing. Like starting a new chapter.

    • felixwhynot@lemmy.world
      3·
      10 months ago

      Hey, hang in there! Glad to hear you end that post on a positive note. If you ever need some support you can drop me a DM, I’ll give it my best!

  • Thorny_Insight@lemm.ee
    8·
    10 months ago

    I’ve never been this stressed in my entire life. It hits me each morning precisely the second I wake up.

    Got laid off from work recently. I don’t feel like finding a new job because I have 10 years of experience and I know I don’t like working for someone else. It feels meaningless. I don’t want to spend my life like that. What’s the alternatine? Well besides the extremely unlikely event of winning the lottery I feel like the only other option is to start my own handyman bussiness that I’ve been “dreaming of” for who knows how many years. I don’t however mean that I have some deep passion for entrepreneurship because I don’t. Not at all. I just feel like it’s the only other option I have and there’s atleast a slight chance that I might like it. Hell, it could even end up being one of the best decisions in my life. Maybe. I don’t know, and I’ll never find out if I don’t try it.

    But doubt. Oh so much doubt. This is by-far the biggest and scariest decision I’ve had to make ever. I know I can just end it if it’s not working out and find a job and that’s that but it just feels so permanent. It feels like I’m putting my entire future on the line. It almost feels like risking my life. It’s stupid and I know it. I just can’t help it. No amount of reasoning is enough to fight off my emotions on this. I’m absolutely and completely terrified.

  • dhcmrlchtdj__@lemmy.world
    7·
    10 months ago

    Bought myself flowers and beignets, supported a friend who was feeling mopey. I’m depressed but it helps to do things for myself and others

  • /home/pineapplelover@lemm.ee
    6·
    10 months ago

    Victories: got conditionally accepted for my 2nd choice for uni (still haven’t told any close friends until I hear back from all schools and make a decision)

    Challenges: I’m taking linear algebra and diff eq. It’s the first week and I forgot how to take derivatives and integrals. I’ve been staring at the problem for hours and still don’t get how to take the derivative for e^(y/x).

  • squid_slime@lemmy.world
    6·
    10 months ago

    Air soft, its been 4 days since a 5 hour session and my legs are killing me. Me and my old friends got together. Challenge was great though

    • /home/pineapplelover@lemm.ee
      4·
      10 months ago

      I haven’t played in a year or so but I love airsoft. My airsoft buddy wants to go shooting with me but honestly, shooting is lame to me, I prefer airsoft. Running around and doing objective missions is more fun than just shooting a target. Although, I love archery and that’s miles better than shooting.

    • FireTower@lemmy.worldOP
      41·
      10 months ago

      You know I’m some stuff could be better but all things considered I feel like today is going better than I would thought it’d be.

  • ComradeSharkfucker@lemmy.ml
    4·
    10 months ago

    Victories: My girlfriend and I are doing a lot better than we were a few months ago. I have only missed 2 assignments this semester and I finally found a method of organization that works for me. I go to class at least half the time which is a lot more than before. Doing good so far :)

    Challenges: My insomnia has been a nightmare recently, I’ve slept 1 out of the past 4 nights and only because I bummed some weed of off a close friend. I haven’t eaten in 16+ hrs and my stomach hurts, I’m getting nauseous and bloated and I couldn’t make it to my 9am class because I was afraid of puking on the way there.

            • cheese_greater@lemmy.world
              1·
              10 months ago

              I’ll do it in baby steps and keep the dialogue open. Okay, you ready to try what I suggest tonight, promise? It’ll be easy

                • cheese_greater@lemmy.world
                  1·
                  10 months ago

                  No way. So here’s what I want you to do: (step 1)

                  1. Get an album or even better, an audiobook for a story you love. Go do that and make sure you really “have it” (nobody can undownload or delete it, taking it away somyou can maintain your consistent structure)

                  You need something you like and that doesn’t rattle you + you’ll be cool with listening to like everynight. Don’t worry so much about being bored or whatever: if all goes well, you won’t be listening too long to the point you may never finish it lol

                  Edit:

                  • are you on Android/iPhone?
                  • can you make sure you have it completely dark? Whether ambiently or by wearing a comfy sleep mask?
  • silverdraco@lemmy.worldEnglish
    4·
    10 months ago

    I know it’s small, but I made up with my wife and told her I don’t like being treated the was she acted. I asked her to talk more with me about what she needs rather than bottle it up. We have some healing, but I feel like it’s an upward swing.

  • Truffle@lemmy.ml
    4·
    10 months ago

    Left a toxic study group and I feel so much lighter and hsppy because of it. Have more time to myself and things that hold interest just for me and my enjoyment. ETA a Word.

      • Truffle@lemmy.ml
        2·
        10 months ago

        Suburban housewives trying to learn a new language through osmosis. It is discouraging to be in a group where noone does the work and tries to actually learn instead thinking that paying for something is enough to master x or y.

        Got tired and left.

  • hperrin@lemmy.world
    3·
    10 months ago

    I added file contents encryption:

    https://github.com/sciactive/nephele/commit/5f18364275ec520fdd50bf456086bc0820ae98d2

    And filename encryption:

    https://github.com/sciactive/nephele/commit/945ba4bcf29ff2a91c00226d87049ed79094b452

    To my WebDAV server:

    https://github.com/sciactive/nephele

    This lets you encrypt files on whatever your storage backend is. So it would be great if you use Amazon S3 as your storage backend, but don’t trust every Amazon employee who has access to that data (maybe a few hundred employees?).

    I started working on this feature basically to blow off steam because my brand new, very expensive server wasn’t working. After many hours of troubleshooting, I think it was just a bad stick of RAM. So I got that going for me, which is nice.

  • RaoulDook@lemmy.worldEnglish
    31·
    10 months ago

    Pretty great, been drinking beer and having steak. Going to proceed to get baked and laid to cap off the evening.

  • Buglefingers@lemmy.world
    2·
    10 months ago

    Currently Waiting for a tow truck because my clutch pipe burst while I’m an hour and a half away from home. Lovely, and probably expensive