I’ve known since I was a kid that I’m depressed. I even have infant photos of me, where I look like I just hate life. Other baby photos the baby is smiling, and interested in everything. Whereas I look like even though I’m too young to even have thoughts, I’m still giving off body language of “leave me alone”.
But when I started asking everyone I knew if they too were depressed, I haven’t gotten one single person to say that they’re happy. Everyone has said they’re depressed. So now I wonder if it’s a regional thing, or if everyone everywhere is depressed.
I don’t trust anyone who isn’t depressed right now
Reminds me of these mgmt lyrics:
if you’re conscious you must be depressed
or at least cynical
Nearly everyone close to me is not depressed.
Hope things get better for you. Most likely they will.
Clinically, no.
Do I have occasional feelings of sadness, anxiety, ennui, helplessness, despair, lack of motivation, etc, and do bad things happen in my life?
Yes, absolutely, that’s a part of being human.
Am I happy?
Well that’s a more complicated question than it may seem.
Am I totally satisfied with every aspect of my life and the world around me as it is now and where it seems to be going?
No, not by a longshot.
Is my situation “good enough” for now, does it seem like things will improve for me, do my good days outnumber the bad, am I overall enjoying life and looking forward to hopefully many more years of it, am I able to spend time with people I love, in places I want to be, doing things I like and want to do?
Overall, yes. Not that there isn’t plenty of room for things to improve for me and lots of things that I would change if I could but I can’t, but I’m getting enough of the things I want out of life that I can say that overall I’m happy.
One year ago, I was told I had 1 to 3 years to live. A few months later, it turned out that wasn’t the case after all. Let me tell you, that whipsaw from impending doom to having a future really changes the perspective. Even when I’m upset or downtrodden, I remember that being able to experience it is a gift.
Years ago I used to say, “another day on my way to the sweet release of death”. Lemme tell you, knowing it’s coming is not what you want or think it will be.
I remember just giving up on life in second grade, refusing to participate or do anything because I was sad. Got tested a bunch after that and given pills that mad me a zombie.
There on out I was treated as a weird kid and that brought a different kind of sadness. Puberty added anger and suicidal ideation. The knowledge that I was fucked up, the world was fucked up, and my life wasn’t going to work out.
Years later here I am, living with the knowledge I was right and watching myself fail at life, finding no joy or peace in anything. Everything is an open sore. Wondering when I’ll get to a point where I rage quit.
I think most of the people I know are anxious or depressed, or both. Hut I don’t know of anyone close to me who is at my level.
Where’d you grow up where everyone is depressed? Detroit? I kid, Detroiters. Y’all got some things going on.
But naw; not depressed and don’t know too many depressed people.
I’m confused, are you talking about literal depression or just feeling generally sad/down?
I’m diagnosed with depression, have been since I was a teenager, but I don’t know many others that are.
I think I just crave an IRL connection tbh. Both of my close friends recently (1 yr ago) moved further away so I only get to see them a few times a year now. My social life has been obliterated. That makes me sad :(
Also yes, the world seems unstable right now but there ain’t much I can do, so I just have to learn to let it go.
I am not depressed, and I don’t think I have ever been (outside of maybe a few days or weeks of sadness when tragic things occurred, but I don’t think that would be classified as depression).
Am I happy? I think so. Maybe it’s more of a contentedness?
I don’t really think of most of the people around me as depressed either. But maybe it’s just that they hide it, or maybe it’s just that I don’t see it due to my own outlook.
I’m the proud owner of “treatment resistant depression”, so yes. I’ve been sad my whole life but I started having suicidal ideation in my late 20’s.
I have a therapist and a psychiatrist so I am medicated and working on it.
Depressions sucks, but the SSRIs that I am on have wiped out my anxiety. It’s like I am a completely new person. I can go grocery shopping without nearly panicking. Somehow I found an (ex) wife before I was medicated but dating is now not quite as painful.
But yeah, I still have varying levels of bad days and I don’t know what happy actually means for me.
I’ve had an issue with my balls(testicles w.e), been sore as fuck. Like someone’s constantly squeezing them really hard, and occasionally I get a punch off em for good measure. I’ve had a huge battery of tests and scans, only thing the Dr can figure is maybe it’s a trapped nerve, so been trying to get in with a specialist to figure that out. Anyway, long story short, the nerve pain meds the Dr put me on are also an antidepressant, so my balls hurt like fuck, but at least I’m in a good mood! 👍
Which med is that, if you don’t mind me asking?
Amitriptyline, it’s got quite a few possible sixe effects, but so far all I’ve gotten is a bit of cotton mouth in the morning.
Definitely not depressed now. I have been when working at a job that drained all my energy every day for years but even then I don’t have clinical depression (which is not normal for humans).
Currently doing well financially and in my family life. I have a great, supportive wife, great kids who are excelling, and a job I very much enjoy and that business is doing well.
I don’t allow outside forces (like politics) to make me sad. Instead I use that energy to do what I can to help those around me and make a very real and tangible difference. Helping others is very satisfying in a way nothing else is.
Do what you can to help your neighbors. It only takes one to make a difference and then others will start doing the same. Be the leader. Change your community.
Are you depressed?
Yes.
Do you know anyone who’s not depressed?
The only happy people I know are wealthy and/or have wealthy parents (usually both, I’ll call wealthy a NAV >$10M) and have never needed to struggle.
I don’t know a single person worth 10 million or anywhere close, if you don’t count my boss’s boss and up. I’m curious where you live.
The SF Bay area, there are a lot of people who are financially independent here
I know lots of people who aren’t depressed.
We also understand a lot more about mental health than we used to, including the fact that mental health challenges are not as unusual as they were once thought to be. Growing up in the 90’s and early 2000’s, I was just a “lazy”, “unmotivated”, and “inattentive” kid. You know, a “space cadet.” I now know that I have ADHD. I have also struggled with depression since childhood. Depression, anxiety, and emotional disregularion are often comorbidities with or symptoms of ADHD. Getting a diagnosis and on proper medication was life changing for me.
But, lack of happiness is not the same as depression. I think sometimes people get those confused. You can be unhappy without being depressed. I would say that there’s a whole lot more unhappy people in the world than depressed people. I also think people often look for joy in the wrong places and expect that “stuff” is going to make them happy. It works. For a bit. But that kind of happiness quickly vaporizes and leaves you feeling as empty as you felt before.
Real happiness comes from a sense of fulfillment. That looks different to different people. I feel happiest when I feel like I’m “grounded”. When I get time to shake off all the responsibilities and BS that gets piled on my plate. Sometimes that’s when I’m kneeling in church on a Sunday morning or taking time out of my relentless schedule to play with my kids. Or when I can get my wife to go for a walk with me. Especially when I can do something that makes someone else’s day a little brighter.
It took a lot of searching to find the things that bring me joy. And the only way to really know if something will is to experience it. Life is hard. On some level there’s just no way around that. But it can also be good. Personally, I’ve had a LOT of hard days. But I’ve had a lot of good days too. For me it makes the hard days worth it.
nope, sounds regional.
maybe perceptual?
or definitive. how are you defining being depressed?
