I’m here for a good time, not a long time

But they aren’t repairable now because you keep setting your fucking wrenches on top of them

Calm down satan

Hmmmmm you sould like a rightoid 🧐🤔 /s

If you lose, you can now do some unethical bowling

Probably pasta

Wow, at least buy it dinner first

We have more in common than everyone wants to believe.

But of course that doesn’t make headlines.

Why is google plus on the keyboard?

Stop thinking logically!

This is why we all need to shop local. I can’t remember the last time I’ve been to Walmart

More proof that it’s OK to take that extra slice of bread at dinner, my dudes

Hot take: corporatism and infotainment. You control money and information, you control the world.

Make flashlights scream when you turn them on.

Have every squeeze of tooth paste contain an air bubble that spews a bit on you.

Have a single dead pixel in the center of every display.

Make fridge doors not close automatically.

Make cars moan, whether ICE or electric.

What sort of effects would that have? I imagine stuff like surface tension wouldn’t exist anymore.

Oh also microwaves wouldn’t work.

Crohns and colitis say hi

You do realise that the potassium alone in your body is more radioactive than that water, right?

You are literally more radioactive.

This isn’t even worth a story.

I remember my friends and I smoked like $500 in weed in one night to celebrate our high school graduation. It was my first time. The only difference I remember feeling is my throat hurting and getting the munchies.

Not gonna lie, I was expecting far worse by now

Just bought this game because of this post