I from the US, just learned about these today, and had a chuckle.
an essex girl was driving down the A13 when her car phone rang. it was her boyfriend, urgently warning her “treacle, i just heard on the news that theres a car going the wrong way on the A13. please be careful!” “its not just one car!” said the essex girl “theres hundreds of them!”
What do Essex girls put behind their ears to attract boys?
Their feet.
(Substitute “Essex” for your least preferred nationality for maximum primary school clout)
There used to be a UK clothes shop called C&A. The joke was -
Why did the Essex girl have C&A knickers?
So she could tell which way round to put them on
Removed by mod
You’re right. But add rich and disconnected too. I’ve never been, but I think Essex is Beverly Hills with bad weather.
Edit: I love being corrected here. I can’t believe how wrong I was. If anyone is interested in the post-mortem of this disinformation, I love British panel shows and hate reality TV. So jokes about The Only Way is Essex completely blend together with Made in Chelsea. I think I thought they were the same because my brain turns off when reality TV comes up.
Holy shit it’s a joke. You take the fun out of everything, if you don’t like it that’s ok, just shut up
Oh no not the misogyny. eyeroll
As a feminist and a leftist, it’s ok to make jokes about people, or even specific groups of people, but it needs to be clever. If you can substitute the target of a joke with any non-specific group of people, it’s not really clever, nor funny.
I know some very funny jokes, where the main target needs to be “dumb”, but it isn’t about the target or target group. In my country the jokes would be about Belgians.
Last week, a Cessna crashed into a Belgian cemetery. So far they’ve found 500 dead, and they’re still searching.
These seem just like misogynistic “women are dumb jokes”
They definitely are!
I had a thought about finding similarly themed jokes about men, but haven’t had any luck yet. It’s true that a good number of blond jokes could be gender agnostic so long as they are just about intelligence.
Many probably are adaptations of old jokes. I’ve heard that one in a neutral version, in my native language, and now here. But yeah, not nice to target women.
Essex, where the girls have a higher sperm count than the boys.
Father’s Day in Essex, the most confusing time of year.
Essex is to the UK what New Jersey is to the US.
Just remembered -
Why was the Essex girl sitting on the park bench with her legs open?
To keep the flies off her ice cream
Not from the UK - why is it Essex in particular?
It’s tricky to define but it has to do with proximity to London (Capital city) and the developing existence of influencers or (it girls) as they were known, combined with poor education and you had a generation of glamorous idiots, that were identified as being from Essex early. Think early Kim Kardashian such as Jordan https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Katie_Price
From the UK, actually born in Essex. Yes, 20-30 years ago people laughed at these, me included. These days you wouldn’t tell them in public, if at all. Same as for ‘Englishman, Irishman, Scotsman’ jokes.
Anytime you’re picking on someone for a characteristic that:
- They didn’t choose
- They can’t change
That’s a bad look. These days if you tell a joke like this at work you’re likely to get bad looks and your sudden employment will look bad.
This is probably true in your little social circle but crude jokes are still told most everywhere and they will by and large still get a good knee slap.
Why don’t they ever do the Christmas nativity in Essex?
They can’t find three wise men or a virgin.
