I made a similar post a couple of years ago, but I think it’s time again after seeing a few nice-guy/incel posts here. So, guys who have made it to the other side, what would you say to your previous self? I’ll leave my own personal answer in a comment below.
90% of what the TV and society told you doesn’t apply.
You aren’t just weird, you have definable conditions.
Go to therapy.
Your needs are as valid as anyone else’s.
Oh my god I thought rom-coms were pure romance and real. They are not. Breaking down most romcoms the vast majority are stalkerish behavior and refusing to accept no. Not like real life at all. Learning that one was hard for me.
This is why Pride and Prejudice is so well regarded. The guy was a creep to the girl and she shut him down hard - and only when he did better, treated her like an equal, and most importantly was willing to take no for an answer did she give him the time of day again.
He was definitely prejudiced against her and made assumptions about her family, and agreed it was only after making amends did he have a chance with her again. I liked that while he obviously did it to pursue her, it wasn’t a desperate attempt or anything, and he was still nervous it’d be a no. And if it was a no, I’m very certain he would have left her alone from then on out.
Yeah. I thought it was exaggerated a little for TV, but, no, that stuff can be straight up harassment irl