• Typhoon@lemmy.ca
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    12 hours ago

    Noem: It’s a war zone out there! It’s crazy!

    Them: What do you mean? People are shooting at each other? Bodies in the streets?

    Noem: They won’t let us pee in their restrooms!

    • IphtashuFitz@lemmy.world
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      12 hours ago

      Well did the ICE agents submit to gender checks first, to make sure they’re using the correct restroom? A copy of their birth certificate should suffice.

      • Hozerkiller@lemmy.ca
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        11 hours ago

        Not good enough we also have to do a manual inspection. Michael testicletickler is going to be doing the inspections. Dont let the name worry you though, he doesn’t tickle testicles only fingers buttholes.

            • BarneyPiccolo@lemmy.today
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              6 hours ago

              I’ll pad my resume by leaving off my college degree. What are they going to do, call every college in America and see if I graduated? Hah! I got this job in the bag.

              I better order some fresh lube. I heard Diddy is selling his old lube on Craigslist.