Russian President Vladimir Putin has suffered an emabarassing setback as his feared Satan 2 nuclear arsenal failed four out of five missile tests, according to arms experts and satellite imagery from the launch site.
High-resolution satellite images of the launch pad at Russia’s Plesetsk test site, where the RS-28 Sarmat intercontinental ballistic missile exploded, shows extensive damage.
A crater approximately 60 meters wide at the launch silo at the Plesetsk Cosmodrome in northern Russia, along with visible damage in the surrounding area that was not present in images taken earlier in the month.
I’m sorry the hwhat?!
I know that a nuke would literally create a hell on earth but there’s no way you can name the fucking thing Satan and not be the bad guy.
Extremely angry at my military for naming it’s unlimited genocide machine “Big Evil Monster” rather than “Widdle Fuzzy Bunny Wabbit”.
Almost don’t even want them to use it anymore.
Can just give it a simple code. We don’t need fun names for this stuff.
That’s why he named it Satan 2.
I wonder how China feels having a North Korea on both sides of its country.
Hey, north Korea’s nuclear missiles work
Try to copy Ukrainian missile from 58 years ago
Fail
Second greatest military in the world!
Second greatest military in the world
I think they might be second best in Russia by now lmfao
Try to copy Ukrainian missile from 58 years ago
When both Russia and Ukraine were part of the USSR?
Second greatest military in the world!
The USSR hasn’t existed for >30 years, since then, Ukraine and Russia have done little but feed on its corpse. Does anyone honestly think modern Russia has a better military than China?
Ukraine has done a lot more to move forward then Russia ever has.
The USSR couldn’t have achieved a fraction of what it did without all its SSRs working together.
Hell it probably wouldn’t have survived getting invaded by every country with a military after WWI without both Russia and Ukraine.
And? I only said the Ukraine has been doing more to increase the quality of life for its citizens then Russia.
Also, it’s a pretty bold claim to say that EVERY nation with a military has tried to invade. I’d like to see a list of that.
it’s a pretty bold claim to say that EVERY nation with a military has tried to invade
It’s only the slightest exaggeration..
Between 1915 and 1920, they were invaded by: United Kingdom, France, US, Japan, Italy, Poland, Czechoslovakia, Greece, Serbia, Romania, China, Estonia, Latvia, Lithuania, The Ottoman Empire, and I’m sure I missed a few more.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Southern_Russia_intervention
Czechoslovakia certainly didn’t invade in the traditional sense, because:
- The troops were there before the bolshevik revolution with the agreement of the Russian government and on the way out of Russia when they were attacked.
- Czechoslovakia didn’t exist yet.
Between 1915 and 1920
Not at all relevant to any current events.
The point was that it’s silly to try to divide up and assign individual responsibility for the achievements of the USSR 30-100+ years ago when those achievements were only possible because Ukraine and Russia were part of a greater whole.
Ever consider rooting for a team that isn’t fascist?
It can be great fun, trust me.
Front fell off
hopefully it gets towed outside the environment. before it removes the environment.
No more cardboard derivatives.
Really hard to adhere to quality if money is being pocketed at every corner and then spend outside the hellhole you created.
I’m sorry, the what missile? I know there’s already “hellfire” missiles, but proclaiming a sequel to Lucifer Morningstar seems a bit silly.
It’s just the NATO designation. Official name is Sarmat.
Satan 2: This time, it’s personal.
Satan 3: Can’t Get Fooled Again
Satan 4: Moscow Drift
Satan Five
Satan 6.66: A rival from hell
Satan 2: Infernal Boogaloo
Russia used to have some of the most advanced rocket science labs and physics programs in the world.
This is a truly sorry state of affairs for a country that has been strip mined from within.
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I would be absolutely terrified of it.
If I lived in Russia.
Thing could blow up and throw radioactive material everywhere.
Putin, the limpest dick in Russia.
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Not so sure. What if these 4/5 nukes explode on the launch pad? Even if this is in a remote area you’ll cause some damage to your own country.
Based on the little bit I know about both Russian military history and the stuff they do now, I suspect they’d be okay with that.
Most nukes are designed such that they only create a nuclear blast when detonated electronically.
We’ve had nukes fall out of airplanes and explode, or nuclear-tipped missiles explode in the silo, without a nuclear blast.
All of those happened before the modern safeguards were adopted by the US. We’re lucky none of them went super-critical. We just don’t know for sure if the Soviet leftovers Russia has were upgraded to the same atandards.
All of those happened before the modern safeguards were adopted by the US.
Which modern safeguards are you talking about? There’s been ~32 official broken arrow incidents between 1950 and 1980, and multiple safeguards were tried during that period. Modern 2 point detonation safety goes back to the early 60s
We just don’t know for sure if the Soviet leftovers Russia has were upgraded to the same atandards.
We do know the soviets had their own share of accidents. I wasn’t able to find any info on soviet nuclear weapon design safety mechanisms, but I feel like we’d have seen at least one nuclear blast if they didn’t have them.
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Yeah, this is the wildest headline. “Don’t fear it, it only works 20% of the time!” Both the US and Russia have somewhere around 1700 known deployed nuclear warheads able to be launched from air, land, and sea. 20% is still 340 nuclear bombs, all of which are substantially larger than the ones dropped in Japan.
The fucking audacity to downplay nuclear war.
Satan 2? What is this high school missile competition?
Almost. It’s NATO propaganda.
I’m always curious about anti-NATO people. What is it about NATO that you don’t like? I’m not very familiar with exactly what they do, but my understanding is that they are a defensive organization. They wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for Russia’s expansionist goals.
Maybe I’m misinformed. Why the NATO hate?
Calling something that’s not good to have delivered to you after a figurative evil being… yea buddy that sure is some propaganda.
You act as if the actual ‘weapon’ is designed to re-seed old growth forests and clean aquifers instead of vaporize a sizable chunk of people/buildings.
Thanks Satan
is russia testing nuclear arms again?
US tested a Minuteman III missile out of Vandenberg earlier this year. It was not carrying a nuclear payload. It’s fairly common for countries to test missiles. Some countries broadcast their intent publicly so as not to accidentally trigger a retaliatory launch. Others don’t broadcast publicly, but they do communicate via the good-old-boy net for the same reason.
Hey Russia, we’re launching a nuke missle with the nuke removed in your direction. Just testing we swear!
This may be off topic, but I absolutely loved reading about Minuteman III guidance system.
And unlike all those “missiles by subscription and good behavior” that many big countries sell to smaller countries, it doesn’t rely on any satellite system or external corrections after launch.
BTW, I wonder what’s inside Russian ICBMs. People often say that all the Russian big cool projects in defense after breakup of the USSR are just finished Soviet projects. If that is true, there must be an awfully complex, but geek-porn-ish thing inside, possibly with analog and maybe even mechanical elements. If that is not, it’s still interesting. Right now yes, Russian military engineering relies on many foreign (NATO countries produced in fact) components. But that didn’t become a thing immediately, so I wonder how did they solve problems.
So, basically their post-soviet tech is all unfinished Soviet designs the soviets could never get to work, with a few western chips thrown in to do the math and control they could never manage.
the soviets could never get to work
No, just what was in progress.
“A few western chips” for military grade applications would be not too easy to get for some time, and USSR and then Russia could produce them, and the process of plants producing such closing was very slow and lasted till late 00s. It’s not the difference between a project stalling and moving further.
It’s the most recent stuff we hear about relying on Western components.
to do the math and control they could never manage
USSR with all its shortcomings did have functional nuclear shield, a space station, domestically produced computers (clones of Western things, yes, but that was a strategic decision, a stupid one though), a space shuttle analog that was arguably better. So “never manage” is usually not the reason for its failures. Economic inefficiency and administrative rot are.
Sort of. The ICBM rocket delivery system.
The US is developing a new ICBM as well.
ok so they’re not “testing nuclear payloads” then. That’s good to know. I was confused as to what they meant with the title.
If they ever do test nuclear payloads, thats going to be a nightmare.
The US at least regularly tests its missiles. They shoot from California toward a Pacific island into a painted target.
Modern ICBMs are insanely accurate.
yeah, that was why i asked about, testing missiles is not weird at all. Testing nuclear bombs would be very weird.
Nukes are tested on super computers since the treaty band.
Except for North Korea while it was catching up.
that’s the general strat, but nothing competes with real world testing fortunately for us, having tested thousands of nukes over the years.
Ya but not with a nuclear nomb just a dummy payload.
How many L’s is this man giving himself?