• A Phlaming Phoenix@lemm.ee
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        11 months ago

        Right. Some people handle this well, others are not open to it. Willingness to adhere to monogamy is a thing that varies from person to person and must be discussed in any relationship. Ethical nonmonogamy is a thing, but it’s not for everyone, and it is a lot of communication and intimate work.

      • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        I said, “indicative of”, not, “yea you’re insecure”. Amazing how you children cannot parse basic perception from accusation.

    • MySwellMojo@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      I mean, I wouldn’t want to deal with the mental gymnastics involved with my significant other getting down with other people

      • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        An open relationship isn’t that weird of a concept to some. It’s about how much others mean to you, not how much of them you posess. People in these comments are fucking pathetic for not understanding this basic fact of healthy relationships: You do not own anyone else. To any degree. Period.

        • Nelots@lemm.ee
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          11 months ago

          That’s a neat story you got there, but literally nobody here is saying they do own someone else.

          • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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            11 months ago

            Why yes you are correct: what I’m saying isn’t appliccable to 100% of people! Do you want a gold star for your basic observation?

            It’s like you retards don’t understand that not everyone has or wants the same relationship.

            You are in this comic.

            • AscendantSquid@lemm.ee
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              11 months ago

              I think most people here agree with you, it’s just that the way you’re speaking to them comes off as judgemental and kinda mean, so they respond accordingly.

                • Nelots@lemm.ee
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                  11 months ago

                  do you want a gold star for your obsevation

                  you retards

                  you are in this comic

                  Haha yeah, only 75% of your comment was attempting to be insulting in some way! How could anybody think you’re being an ass? Poe’s law sure is crazy.

                  • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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                    11 months ago

                    Right, I’m definitely not commenting about the previous part of the discussion. Or did you forget that happened?

                    Retard is apparently appropriate.

            • Nelots@lemm.ee
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              11 months ago

              I said nobody here. I.e. these comments, the people you said think that. Would you like a participation trophy for your reading comprehension?

        • MySwellMojo@lemmy.world
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          11 months ago

          No ownership, but sharing time. I want to buy a house not a time-share. I want that deep emotional connection with someone. I don’t have the capacity to have more than one deep connection and would like someone similar. If my partner chooses they want something open, that’s fine, but we would transition to friends

    • Spendrill@lemm.ee
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      11 months ago

      Yes, but the vast majority of us do have some insecurities and you can at least be honest with yourself and your partner about them.

      • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        Agreed, but know what they are. They aren’t lines to control someone with. They’re lines someone should agree with and should know may be signs of other controlling behavior. So many people are OK with being controlled and it’s frankly pathetic.

    • peopleproblems@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Ha, C&E are actually relationship needs of mine, friend.

      In fact, I think the others are more indicative of my insecurities, but hey, I’m not anxious-avoidant so I don’t know for sure.

      • MotoAsh@lemmy.world
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        11 months ago

        If you’re dealing with the boundaries healthily, then it’s not so much an insecurity and more of a limitation. If others are aware and OK with it, I’d call that healthily dealt with. Whether or not the limitation is a problem is merely a matter of preference, and luckily it sounds like yours line up.

        I love how everyone assumes “indicative of” is a direct accusation… As if false red flags based on perception do not exist. People are so small minded.

    • agitatedpotato@lemmy.world
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      11 months ago

      Im someone for whom C is a necessity like the person you’re responding too and I think you’re 100% right.

      It may not be a nessesarily pathological insecurity, but it absolutely is an insecurity.

      If I felt more secure I’d probably be able to deal with it. I don’t think that means im a necessarily insecure person, or am someone for whom insecurity is a clinical problem, but at least comparatively that makes it an insecurity.

      You can get depressed and not have depression, you can get insecure and not be an insecure person, heck you can even maintain a healthy amount of anxiety. These are essentially just human traits and there’s no shame in admitting that I have a trait that’s at least a little rooted in insecurity so long as it doesn’t negatively impact my life.