And then their kids grow up with parents that don’t make a sound when they move around the house (developed skill to not be noticed and subsequently harassed/abused) and they develop hyper vigilance and have to try re-learn how to relax when living on their own.
Damn, that’s me. I’m a big boy, but i move so silently that i scare the shit outta my wife on the regular when i appear next to her. i also cannot relax if i can’t see all people and exits in the room. More than a one-on-one meeting sucks ass because the more people there are, the less i can keep a person under observation to make sure i’m safe from mood swings.
That’s exhausting and so i just avoid it if possible. In public i am nothing without my noise cancelling headphones; worst experience i can have is a mess hall where everyone speaks because i just can’t stop listening if someone’s voice becomes threatening, so my mind tries to listen to a thousand conversations at once. I’d rather go hungry lol
My father never acknowledged what he did to me before he died; but i’m pretty sure he had similar issues and coped by drinking. I am very relaxed and a very social guy when drunk, so at least he serves as a warning for me to not rely on that crutch. he drank himself to death after everyone fled from his choleric drunkenness, i will not share the same fate.
Yeah, i make a conscious effort to make a small amount of noise so i don’t startle people (assuming i don’t just whack my hand/side on a doorknob and swear loudly anyway lol). I can’t not hear every conversation around me and it annoys people sometimes.
And then their kids grow up with parents that don’t make a sound when they move around the house (developed skill to not be noticed and subsequently harassed/abused) and they develop hyper vigilance and have to try re-learn how to relax when living on their own.
Break the cycle.
Use your parents skills and your hyper vigilance to instead make something better.
It’s time for you to have kids and start a new ninja clan 🥷
Damn, that’s me. I’m a big boy, but i move so silently that i scare the shit outta my wife on the regular when i appear next to her. i also cannot relax if i can’t see all people and exits in the room. More than a one-on-one meeting sucks ass because the more people there are, the less i can keep a person under observation to make sure i’m safe from mood swings.
That’s exhausting and so i just avoid it if possible. In public i am nothing without my noise cancelling headphones; worst experience i can have is a mess hall where everyone speaks because i just can’t stop listening if someone’s voice becomes threatening, so my mind tries to listen to a thousand conversations at once. I’d rather go hungry lol
My father never acknowledged what he did to me before he died; but i’m pretty sure he had similar issues and coped by drinking. I am very relaxed and a very social guy when drunk, so at least he serves as a warning for me to not rely on that crutch. he drank himself to death after everyone fled from his choleric drunkenness, i will not share the same fate.
Yeah, i make a conscious effort to make a small amount of noise so i don’t startle people (assuming i don’t just whack my hand/side on a doorknob and swear loudly anyway lol). I can’t not hear every conversation around me and it annoys people sometimes.
lol i do that too, mostly by making my footsteps louder, but i can relate to the hitting of doorknobs - mostly with the elbows