Probably a boring answer but I know my grandmother’s credit card information. I live with and help take care of her, so she doesn’t mind sharing it with me. Not like I’m planning to do anything nefarious, but I guess technically it could ruin her financially.
Yeah I can see how this is complicated.
I don’t see why you don’t share that you got the job offer and then tell your kids that you’ll have to work out custody arrangements with their mother. And then share with the kids how those discussions go. I think they’re old enough (as teens) to have a say in those discussions, as well as be privy to how they go.
There’s no reason they shouldn’t see it unfold in front of them; just make sure that you’re never the one to specifically say “your mother won’t work anything out with me so moving overseas with me would mean I never see you again”