When I was 15, my physics teacher . . . never mind. In hindsight it was wrong. Back then, it was heaven, lot’s of summer vacation heaven. I’d like to point out that Mary was 13 and Joseph was 45. Take that, hypocrite Christians. You worshiping a hebephile? I confessed to my dad when he was on his deathbed. He smiled and said “attaboy.” then fell asleep. It was the last thing he said to me. I sprinkled his ashes along the entire length of the PCT and each time I said “Attaboy.” I feel bad for this teacher’s “victim.” The justice system, media and everyone in school will know and victimize him for it. Justice will victimize him far worse than anything she did to him. Mercy bears richer fruits than strict justice.
What if your physics teacher got pregnant and decided to keep the child? What if you got an STD? What if you rejected/cheated on her and she gave you bad grades or made up shit about you to get you expelled? Would it have been an “attaboy” in that common situation?
Realistically unless you press charges there won’t be a criminal proceeding. Even in your case, having the option of a criminal proceeding gives you a lot of protection. You’re lucky you didn’t need to use it. I’d venture a vast majority of times don’t end up like yours. It’s never “just sex”.
I’d venture a vast majority of times don’t end up like yours.
Really? I would bet the opposite. Sure, it is ethically questionable… but the fact is that power dynamics are sexy. Like, a sexually mature but inexperienced and ultra horny teen gets the opportunity to have sex with their teacher? Yes sir/ma’am! The porno almost writes itself!
And selection bias - you will almost always only hear about the teacher/student sex that goes wrong somehow. Every once in a while, someone like the above poster will talk about their positive experience, shrouded by anonymity. But you can see the downvotes they are getting. The whole subject is taboo, which means they will almost certainly never share their experience. And even if they did, publicly, no news source would ever report “teen has sex with teacher, says ‘This is awesome!!!’” There are strong cultural incentives against being public about healthy, enjoyable teacher/student sexual relationships that end amicably.
I’m downvoting it for the premise that there’s usually nothing wrong with it. It may work out in some cases, but I only hear about it rarely compared to the times it did work out. A lady interviewed about her positive experience with David Bowie when she was a teen (I wouldn’t downvote her, she vouched for the guy not the practice). This guy says he has a good experience. Then there are thousands of others that didn’t. Scientific papers showing negatives, and virtually no positives to outweigh the risk. It’s almost like advocating for gambling, some may win but most will lose. Glad that the op was a winner.
I have no evidence for this. I am just guessing - given my priors that power dynamics are hot, most people are nice but will compromise social ethics for their own desires when given the opportunity, and that there are strong social biases against reporting positive experiences.
Interesting, this also leads to what is perhaps my most controversial opinion. In an ideal world, teen-adult sex wouldn’t be taboo, but would instead be commonplace and accepted.
Our current system for introducing people to the world of sex is to give them some vaguaries and say “okay, now get to it with other people who have no idea what they are doing. You may or may not be making Jesus cry.” This is the exact opposite of what we would do if we were to talk about an important part of an individual’s maturation into adulthood in the abstract. We would agree that they would benefit from guidence and instruction from someone who is experienced and knowledgeable, and who can council them through difficulties they encounter. Instead, if we actually had a sexually open culture, people with ample sexual experience (adults) would be the ones to introduce adolescents to sex - either directly or through explicit instruction. Of course now this is, once again, sounding like a porno… so I’ll just leave it at that
Power dynamics can be hot, only when they’re consensual. You can’t take a minor and give them a safe word that turns them 25.
In a world where sex with teenagers wasn’t taboo, even then we still want it to be illegal to counter the power imbalance. It gives power to the less informed party. That world would also require curing all STDs, all disease, abortion being universally acceptable, perfect birth control, and nearly perfect emotional maturity from everyone - mandatory perfect parenting, school, and therapy for 100% of people, free mandatory parenting, probably a post- singularity situation if it’s even conceivable. We might also envision a world where theft is acceptable, or murder, because we’ve progressed so far as a society that we lose any ability to carry trauma, and thus lose our sense of self. I don’t think these will ever happen and if we do there would be no laws at all.
How do you know he will be victimized? You don’t seem to feel that way. Would it have been different for you if others knew or something? I’m not disagreeing, just curious.
When I was 15, my physics teacher . . . never mind. In hindsight it was wrong. Back then, it was heaven, lot’s of summer vacation heaven. I’d like to point out that Mary was 13 and Joseph was 45. Take that, hypocrite Christians. You worshiping a hebephile? I confessed to my dad when he was on his deathbed. He smiled and said “attaboy.” then fell asleep. It was the last thing he said to me. I sprinkled his ashes along the entire length of the PCT and each time I said “Attaboy.” I feel bad for this teacher’s “victim.” The justice system, media and everyone in school will know and victimize him for it. Justice will victimize him far worse than anything she did to him. Mercy bears richer fruits than strict justice.
Not even taking into account how old the holy spirit was.
What if your physics teacher got pregnant and decided to keep the child? What if you got an STD? What if you rejected/cheated on her and she gave you bad grades or made up shit about you to get you expelled? Would it have been an “attaboy” in that common situation?
Realistically unless you press charges there won’t be a criminal proceeding. Even in your case, having the option of a criminal proceeding gives you a lot of protection. You’re lucky you didn’t need to use it. I’d venture a vast majority of times don’t end up like yours. It’s never “just sex”.
Really? I would bet the opposite. Sure, it is ethically questionable… but the fact is that power dynamics are sexy. Like, a sexually mature but inexperienced and ultra horny teen gets the opportunity to have sex with their teacher? Yes sir/ma’am! The porno almost writes itself!
And selection bias - you will almost always only hear about the teacher/student sex that goes wrong somehow. Every once in a while, someone like the above poster will talk about their positive experience, shrouded by anonymity. But you can see the downvotes they are getting. The whole subject is taboo, which means they will almost certainly never share their experience. And even if they did, publicly, no news source would ever report “teen has sex with teacher, says ‘This is awesome!!!’” There are strong cultural incentives against being public about healthy, enjoyable teacher/student sexual relationships that end amicably.
I’m downvoting it for the premise that there’s usually nothing wrong with it. It may work out in some cases, but I only hear about it rarely compared to the times it did work out. A lady interviewed about her positive experience with David Bowie when she was a teen (I wouldn’t downvote her, she vouched for the guy not the practice). This guy says he has a good experience. Then there are thousands of others that didn’t. Scientific papers showing negatives, and virtually no positives to outweigh the risk. It’s almost like advocating for gambling, some may win but most will lose. Glad that the op was a winner.
I have no evidence for this. I am just guessing - given my priors that power dynamics are hot, most people are nice but will compromise social ethics for their own desires when given the opportunity, and that there are strong social biases against reporting positive experiences.
Interesting, this also leads to what is perhaps my most controversial opinion. In an ideal world, teen-adult sex wouldn’t be taboo, but would instead be commonplace and accepted.
Our current system for introducing people to the world of sex is to give them some vaguaries and say “okay, now get to it with other people who have no idea what they are doing. You may or may not be making Jesus cry.” This is the exact opposite of what we would do if we were to talk about an important part of an individual’s maturation into adulthood in the abstract. We would agree that they would benefit from guidence and instruction from someone who is experienced and knowledgeable, and who can council them through difficulties they encounter. Instead, if we actually had a sexually open culture, people with ample sexual experience (adults) would be the ones to introduce adolescents to sex - either directly or through explicit instruction. Of course now this is, once again, sounding like a porno… so I’ll just leave it at that
Power dynamics can be hot, only when they’re consensual. You can’t take a minor and give them a safe word that turns them 25.
In a world where sex with teenagers wasn’t taboo, even then we still want it to be illegal to counter the power imbalance. It gives power to the less informed party. That world would also require curing all STDs, all disease, abortion being universally acceptable, perfect birth control, and nearly perfect emotional maturity from everyone - mandatory perfect parenting, school, and therapy for 100% of people, free mandatory parenting, probably a post- singularity situation if it’s even conceivable. We might also envision a world where theft is acceptable, or murder, because we’ve progressed so far as a society that we lose any ability to carry trauma, and thus lose our sense of self. I don’t think these will ever happen and if we do there would be no laws at all.
How do you know he will be victimized? You don’t seem to feel that way. Would it have been different for you if others knew or something? I’m not disagreeing, just curious.