Did you know that Trump was never actually President? Hillary was President and he whole time. She actually still is.

God is just E=mc^2

If you can attain enough energy to convert it into mass, you are all-powerful.

He wasn’t even fired, he had his contract end. Fucking boohoo.

Water is dihydrogen monoxide, fucking watch out y’all

Not that I’m being dismissive of corporate greed destroying our fucking planet and species. More like… maybe they built the headline so we’d craft these nihilistic jokes and not care as much? I really don’t care anymore, when do we get to mutilate and torture energy chiefs?