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Joined 7 months ago
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Cake day: May 28th, 2024

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  • I bought a convertible car that was completely ditched once. The canvas roof was in such a state that it consisted mostly of black bags and duct tape.

    I ring a friend and ask him what he’s doing and if he wants to go for a drive in said car.

    He said he’s too busy 'cause he has a bunch of jobs to apply to and wants to spend the day handing out his CV. I say that’s a perfect excuse to drive the new car round.

    Get to his house and show him the car and we decide we should drive round with the top down because it’s sunny. The top is made of duct tape and bin liners though, so we grab a kitchen knife each and set to work on getting it off.

    First place he wants to go is a job for a theatre tech. We drive over to the next town and I pull up and he runs in with just his CV and leaves all his possessions (coat, phone, wallet, etc) in the car.

    Unbeknownst to me, the guy he handed his CV to gave him a tour and a bit of an interview on the spot so I’d be stuck there for an hour in the same parking space.

    Also unbeknownst to me, the theatre was at a high school so I’m now suddenly surrounded by kids leaving at the end of the school day.

    It’s awkward enough that I’m a guy in my late 20s parked outside a school in a convertible, but it took me a few minutes to realise that all the staring I was recieving from the kids was because the back seat was covered in black bags and duct tape held down with the two biggest knives I could find in my kitchen.

    The police even came and I was hoping they would stop so I could explain but they just kept driving past me at walking speed.






  • Lol.

    Seven years ago I spent hours trying to explain to my MP that this would happen if they weakened encryption and put in back doors.

    He seemingly couldn’t get his head round the fact that you have to assume foreign adversaries have access to everything in transit and they’re not going to be worried about longer prison sentences designed to make up for weaker security.

    I should send him an email asking if he understands the argument now it’s coming from an American in a suit and not just one of the plebs.