A standalone remote or phone app that connects to my car’s entertainment system that can control the satellite radio without the need for a passenger to have to lean way forward to use the touchscreen all the time. I miss the days of screen controls next to the cup holders instead of everything going through the touch screen.

I bet the orange turd makes a crack like “How about that global warming?”

Haha. This is the very first thing I thought of.

I bought some powdered water, but didn’t know what to add.

The correct answer is “Enya”

May everything you drink taste like ass, and that ass was filled with dead gerbils that died due to dysentery and that dysentery was caused by ingesting the asses of other dead gerbils.

Thats awful. Definitely a wurst käse scenario.

Usenet Newsgroups were a big part of my life back then. Games, MP3s, Software, Movies, TV shows. So many Xbox games that I burned to DVD and loaded onto my modded Xbox. Those were the days. Now I only torrent some movies and TV shows thru a VPN and pay for everything else. My time is worth a lot more to me now than back in the late 90s/early 2000s.

Well it was Missouri after all. The raccoon was likely breaded and deep fried before the eagle ate it.

I mean…North Dakota is South Dakota’s North Korea after all.

“I can see Russia from my couch!” - JD Vance

Ah, a “nabbin’ van”

They’ll be fine. They mostly go to Cornhub anyway.

I recently used my phone to wirelessly charge someone else’s phone that was about to die. Pretty useful feature in the moment. I only used that feature only that one time in the 2 years I’ve had the phone but it’s nice to know that is an option.

Any character played by Juliette Lewis. Um, yeah.

Right now it’s Howard Stern 100, but I took about a 5 year break from listening to him until a month ago.

Since I usually self check at Walmart and other places that have it, I place the big items in the cart with the bar code accessible for hand scanning without removal, frozen/refridgerated items generally together, everything else in cart doesn’t really matter to me. The upper cart space (where toddlers/baby could go) is where I place my eggs, bread, and fresh veggies. Then I scan in this order: Frozen items, regular cart items, eggs/bread, weighed veggies, (bagging and putting back in the cart as i scan them) lastly use the hand scanner for the big items. Sometimes I scan the big items first if i know i need to place bags on top. Once I see that everything has been bagged and back in the cart, then I’m confident that I didn’t miss anything, pay, and then GTFO. I’m an efficient self checkout machine, haha

Did your peen spaghettify as it thrust it’s way past the event horizon of my mom’s singularity?

Wow it finally happened. Now I wonder if they’ll take away his Grammy, 2 Oscar’s, MTV Movie Award, Nickelodeon Teen Choice Award, and induction into the Grand Ole Opry.

A student film maker asks for movie pitch ideas on a popular social media forum and receives the perfect idea. The person responding is actually a rouge A.I. that coerces the OP into cowriting the movie script, which gets accepted by the movie production company. The rouge A.I. then infiltrates OP’s life by making them famous online and rich and happy beyond their wildest dreams, only to be slowly taken away by the A.I. until OP is broke and living out of their car which only starts when the A.I. allows it to. OP dies in their car when the A.I. shuts the car off as the car is pulling up to train tracks. Woooooo Woooooooooo