I can vouch for salt and sanctuary if you like Souls-like.

It’s a blast with coop

Checkout Doctor Frankenstein UK for most things you wanna do with it. Buy him a coffee if you find it useful. I sure did, and I did.

https://drfrankenstein.co.uk/

See their hiring process.

So you can dual wield.

Baguette.

Breaguette knife.

Akimbo

Game changer for who?

The surveillance state?

Not actually legal if it is Amazon. Could report them to USPS if you wanted to be that guy.

Knowing that I didn’t bother to check it for 5 days in a row?

Almost do most things you could do that you’ve done for decades, and can still do on a competitor, on a $1500 device is not a selling point.

Kobo?