Also known as parakeety

I just recently chased my two giggling teenagers and wife around a store with a small trex hand puppet and I’m a grown-ass man.

Firm believer in embracing humor and staying young and yes I bought the puppet.

https://lemmy.world/post/22143486

There’s prank hardware you can buy for cheap that beeps at irregular intervals similar to this.

Preschool teacher: draw a happy fish Preschool student: <the above picture>

I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU…BUT I COULD MURDER A CURRY

Aren’t we one of the largest threats to all living things? I mean, it even works when you replace the word lions with humans in that sentence.

The right kinds of friends will totally see this as an acceptable excuse.

My brain automatically read that in Keanu Reeves’s character from the movie Parenthood.

Bill and Ted’s might also work though.

Gandalf?

I know a person whose parent made it a habit of driving around and harassing homeless people from their car with a bull horn.

Think about that. Some people have no decency or morals.

Lol

The game was kind enough to gift me -170 billion billion billion billion wagons.

Not arguing but curious. Could anything that escaped have a chance of becoming invasive?

No no no, see:

FBI Director Christopher Wray said that his sentence should serve as “a stark warning to all those entrusted with protecting national defense information: betray that trust, and you will be held accountable.”

They mean business! For real this time. No take backs. While supplies last. Void in some states. Not all locations participate. Some restrictions apply.

“This hurts me more than it hurts you”

Yum! I do this with tortilla chips crushed slightly and let them soak in the melting butter in the pan while it warms up. Same thing in reverse mostly. Delicious.

If that ladybug makes it out, it’ll have one hell of a story to share with its fellow bugs.

Sounds like a great writing prompt actually.

Who knew normalizing being nasty in public would have this kind of effect? /s

Sneakers

My cat, a 3 year old tuxedo, does this strange yawn-meow when it’s time for dinner. It’s a combination of him meowing mixed with a full wide mouthed yawn. Its especially funny because he only does it once per night shortly before feeding and he typically has a chirpy meow anyway.