• Cheradenine@sh.itjust.works
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      20 days ago

      It would have been criminal under the law. I cheated, she cheated. It was the law, whatever agreement she and I had was immaterial.

      • MagicShel@lemmy.zip
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        20 days ago

        That’s just how the system is. My wife and I are into bdsm. Legally speaking I’m guilty of spousal abuse because she legally can’t consent.

        So we just ignore the law. But if we ever divorced acrimoniously she could rake me over the fucking coals.

          • Jerkface (any/all)@lemmy.ca
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            20 days ago

            It must be a weird edge case. You can certainly consent to being beaten, humiliated, degraded, etc.

            One thing you cannot consent to where I live is to be touched sexually while you are asleep. The moment you become unconscious (as though that were a thing with a clear, bright line definition) any sexual consent you have given is deemed to have been revoked. This seems rather paternalistic to me since you can consent to have your leg chopped off while you sleep, but whatever. There have been cases where police and crown prosecutors went after charges because someone talked about letting their husband have sex with them while they slept; ie they had moral consent but not legal consent, and so were charged with sex crimes over the protest of their willing partner.

          • MagicShel@lemmy.zip
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            20 days ago

            A woman can’t consent to being hit in my state. Or at least that was the common consensus when we were social about it.

            I just looked it up and some random website says it’s fine with consent so either the entire community was misinformed, something has changed, or that website was full of shit.

              • MagicShel@lemmy.zip
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                20 days ago

                Edited with more info. Idk. In Michigan if you hit your wife, my understanding is the cops will prosecute you whether she agrees to file charges or not.

                For the record we are both in our fifties.