It’s gotta be the super mario man himself hailing from Georgia, Iosif Stalin.
-
Wins against the nazis, doesn’t elaborate, leaves, USSR becomes the sugar daddy of the eastern bloc
-
Has a really cool looking moustache. No wonder he gets parodied as Mario
-
Literally outwitted his enemies by playing the “innocent secretary” and gaining power.
-
Was highly respected and feared by his enemies
-
Is still parodied and memes have spread of him by both tankies and non tankies alike
-
Is in Red Alert 1
-
Massive troll in pranking the other party members, he would throw bits of fruit into their drinks.
-
Isn’t Hitler.
If we’re going for “cool story” rather than “admirable person”, then the Byzantine emperor Justinian II.
For me, Stalin falls out of the cool category due to deaths under his leadership (about 3.3 million officially recorded victims).
I have always enjoyed Alice Roosevelt, Teddy Roosevelt’s daughter. She was brash, witty, at full of antics. Here’s an example: When it came time for the Roosevelt family to move out of the White House, Alice buried a Voodoo doll of the new first lady, Nellie Taft, in the front yard.
For a while, I’ve mentioned that the most logical course of action after the Napoleon and Oppenheimer movies is a Marcus Aurelius one, complete with Peter “Optimus Prime” Cullen as Marcus Aurelius.
Hadrian
Theodore Roosevelt
As he famously said:
What’s up, bitches!
Cyrus the Great.
Hank Scorpio is the only correct answer. Or maybe it’s wrong, i dunno, but I think it’s correct.
As a russian I’m saying: fuck Stalin and USSR. After Lenin it was seemed like Orwell’s antiutopia. And now Putler wants it back…
