- cross-posted to:
- [email protected]
- cross-posted to:
- [email protected]
- He’s dead, so stop looking. He’s not in a Russian basement with electrodes on his balls or anything, he’s dead! - -Russian government - You want a some DNA? I can get you a some DNA, believe me. There are ways, Dude. - The FSB might get it wrong again and deliver s signed NDA and The Sims expansion DLC. 
 
- with electrodes on his balls - That sounds kind of hot tho 
 
- “Russia says” - When the news came, he was killed by Putin. Now, he couldn’t be dead, but being tortured in some hell governed by Putin. Quite the propaganda around here. 
 
- Ah, but what’s their story as to why the plane crashed? 
- Plane falls out of sky, find DNA, assume person is dead? You just got fooled by the oldest trick in the book. i.e., The reason Bane does a quick blood transfusion at the start of Dark Knight Rises. 
- From the government who was falsifying drug test at the Olympics using their secret service. Right… 
- It was an accident. He fell out through a window in the plane 
- Could have just done launched a missile inventory audit. 





