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fossilesque@mander.xyzM to Science Memes@mander.xyzEnglish · 3 days ago

A clean colon is like driving on a country road on a sunny day...

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A clean colon is like driving on a country road on a sunny day...

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fossilesque@mander.xyzM to Science Memes@mander.xyzEnglish · 3 days ago
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  • Haaveilija@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Is this colonialism?

  • arsCynic@lemmy.ml
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    1 day ago

    That analogy is spot on. Everyone knows how light one feels after the first post-coffee morning dump.

  • Hond@piefed.social
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    3 days ago

    I dont get it. There was never snow in my asshole???

    • fossilesque@mander.xyzOPM
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      3 days ago

      Not with that attitude

      • jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works
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        3 days ago

        All we need is a toboggan, a funnel, a couple shots of fireball, safety goggles, and a positive mental attitude.

        • agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
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          2 days ago

          • FosterMolasses@leminal.space
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            2 days ago

        • spinnetrouble@sh.itjust.works
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          3 days ago

          Friend of mine used to work for a 24-hour big box store in Michigan. He was working an evening shift after a big snow dump when two college kids came through his lane with trash bags, a container of vaseline, and a bottle of vodka. They didn’t even spring for the goggles!

          • jubilationtcornpone@sh.itjust.works
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            3 days ago

            Sigh Kids… Always wear PPE. A dirty snowball to the eye is no joke.

            • spinnetrouble@sh.itjust.works
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              3 days ago

              At least bring lunch trays and goggles, boys. Busted tailbones are no joke

      • 0ops@piefed.zip
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        3 days ago

        Nor this altitude

      • Hond@piefed.social
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        3 days ago

        fair enough

    • dustycups@aussie.zone
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      3 days ago

      Snow in my asshole? In this economy??

    • shittydwarf@piefed.social
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      3 days ago

      The ploughs must have been out

      • I_am_10_squirrels@beehaw.org
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        3 days ago

        I love getting my colon plowed

  • socsa@piefed.social
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    3 days ago

    How many times do I need to ask you to stop posting my grindr profile on social media?

  • djsoren19@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    2 days ago

    How are you supposed to know the cleanliness of your colon?

    • weariedfae@sh.itjust.works
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      2 days ago

      So my partner literally had a colonoscopy this week.

      I don’t know how to do spoiler tags and they often don’t work on my app anyway so WARNING: GROSS.

      You drink a special laxative and chew these special pills to empty everything out and, critically, you know when you’re clean when your poop comes out identical to pee. Translucent yellow liquid. The instructions have a color chart and everything.

      • BanMe@lemmy.world
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        My elderly neighbor doesn’t exactly follow rules. She had a colonoscopy earlier this year. They sent her home because she “wasn’t clean.” She had to repeat the process later, and I can’t imagine she was a Sunny Country Road, but they at least completed the exam that time. I am still mortified for her, my first colonoscopy was last year, I spent a full day on the toilet prepping. Nearly slept in the bathtub.

    • Hazmatastic@lemmy.world
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      You dont need to know yourself, just follow the instructions the doctor gives you before the procedure. Usually fasting, maybe a rinse.

      • Dicska@lemmy.world
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        2 days ago

        Hang them on the fence inside out and hose them down with a garden hose.

        • Hazmatastic@lemmy.world
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          I mean, it’s not the first option I’d go with but it is certainly one of the ideas I’ve ever heard

      • BeardedGingerWonder@feddit.uk
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        Sometimes they send entirely inadequate instructions you know aren’t going to work and then you have to go more than once. That’s a pain in the ass.

        • ubergeek@lemmy.today
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          To be fair, even going one time will be a pain the ass. Returning a second time will be another pain in the ass.

      • djsoren19@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        how do I know if I did a good job or not though? Do I just gotta trust that I followed the instructions correctly?

        I’m just sayin give me a lil camera so I can check.

        • ubergeek@lemmy.today
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          Oh… you will know, because you will only be shitting clear liquid, every 30-90 minutes half way through the protocol.

    • Bloomcole@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Just get a bag of that road de-icing salt

    • JillyB@beehaw.org
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      The graphic is urging a patient to actually do the required prep. The prep cleans you out.

  • NigelFrobisher@aussie.zone
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    2 days ago

    Is there a hosepipe adapter for your bum? Asking for a friend.

    • 🍉 Albert 🍉@lemmy.world
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      1 day ago

      douche hose adapters exists

    • SCmSTR@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      2 days ago

      DO NOT USE A PRESSURE WASHER

    • Nikls94@lemmy.world
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      2 days ago

      Do you want the one shaped like a dildo or is classic butt plug okay?

  • krashmo@lemmy.world
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    3 days ago

    It’s ribbed for your pleasure

  • Hikermick@lemmy.world
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    2 days ago

    Almost heaven?

    • biggerbogboy@sh.itjust.works
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      West Virginia?

  • flambonkscious@sh.itjust.works
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    And, it’s fucking fascinating. Don’t get sedated, watch the weirdness!

    • weariedfae@sh.itjust.works
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      Huh. They didn’t give my partner a choice when they got a colonoscopy.

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