On the shitter same as always, how about you?

Bouillon? Bullion is something else

What is this too much food

I’m shitting right now can I fill my pot with gold please

Barking at the dog from birdbath

Dude I fucking hate that movie. I’m in the (personal, not global. I know we’re all in the global bad universe) bad universe and I do not like thinking about the good one

Maybe be more careful where UP

Is keepupology under physics, engineering, mathematics, philosophy, sociology, or spoken Finnish?

I would like a cigar, yes please

No I’m eating gummy worms and it’s making me hungrier

Sometimes you miss the taste of hooves, but I’m with you

Burma shave

i’ve got the vim half, do i want to understand the kink half? I’m trying to figure out whether to devote brainpower to figuring this out because, uh, yeah there’s some things i regret learning.

are romans just vampires is that how latin works

that’s good because he’s been promoted to admiral and is on the nimitz

Esquite (i am too lazy to put the accents in right now)

have you considered burying your prank in the transpacific garbage patch?

Feel this sweater instead. It’s real velour!